Chapter 8

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H B o m b

Thoughts rushed through my head.

What if they didn't like me anymore?

What if the rest of the members didn't like me because I'm gay?

What if, what if, what if.

SNAP OUT OF IT LIAM. STOP WITH THE WHAT IFS! IT'LL BE FINE!

I met the group at the convention center and met a bunch of fans.

We were walking around the crowded event, laughing, talking, and vlogging as to be expected.

I couldn't shake the what ifs. They stayed with me.

And I broke.

I ran. I ran to the bathroom so I could cry. I had no where else.

"LIAM! LIAM, WHAT HAPPENED? COME ON, YOU KNOW YOU CAN TRUST ME!" I hear Parker screaming from behind.

I ran into a stall and locked it.

"Li-am!" Parker said out of breath from the other side of the door. "Liam... what wrong?"

He sounded so sincere. It made my heart melt.

"Don't cry, Liam. It makes me sad." I could almost hear him pouting.

"I'm sorry, Parker. I'm a terrible person. I'm making everything be about me. I'm should just go home." I admitted.

"DON'T SAY THAT ABOUT YOURSELF. WE'RE YOUR FRIENDS! WE WOULD NEVER LEAVE YOU. YOU NEED TO REALIZE THAT." He screamed.

"Thank you, Parker, bu-" He cut me off.

"All your efforts to try to keep me away from you are going to fail."

I thought I had made my decision on who I liked, but that was turned to dust.

I opened the door slowly.

Parker jumped at me and gave me a hug and I hugged him right back.

"Thank you." I said almost inaudible.

We just stood there hugging for what seemed like mere seconds, but was actually minutes.

I broke the hug and looked down at my shoes.

He picked my chin up with his finger, and before I knew it, I had kissed him.

It felt right.

I was more confused then ever. I thought I liked Graser.

I broke the kiss and just stood there.

"You okay?" Parker asked.

"I don't know. I took that walk this morning because I needed to figure out my feelings. I thought I had, but apparently not." I sighed. "I thought I liked Graser, but I don't know anymore. The kiss... felt... so right."

Before I could say anything more, his lips were back on mine.

This time he was more into it. He pushed me into the stall and closed the door, without breaking our connection.

He pushed me against the door, but I broke the kiss once again.

"Look, Parker, I really don't know what I feel anymore. That kiss was amazing, trust me, but I really don't know. And kissing either of you before I can give you an answer just hurts me. I don't want to hurt you two." I said sincerely.

"I get it, Liam. Let's go back to the group."

We got back and they flooded me with questions.

All I said was, "I don't know."

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