Seeking a future

To the heart

Talking to Levi required you to know that he looks like he's not really listening to what you are saying, but he is actually listening to everything with great tact and value. Surprisingly, he is one of the best listeners I know. Sometimes I will babble on for hours and he will ask me a question of something I said a long time ago -sometimes I don't even remember saying it since I say so much. Conversations with him were great, even small talk.
I was actually glad I had told Levi about my dream. I shook all the paranoia off my shoulders; and a good thing too.

We finish packing and go check on our horses, and to our shock: one was missing. The other looked terrified. We assume it was a titan who snatched the poor thing or maybe it had somehow escaped from its rope that Levi neatly tied up. I even named the horse Ceres.
I then realize Levi and I will have to ride on the same horse, My stomach gets a weird tingly feeling just thinking about it.

"Well, that's horse number 15 since I have joined the Corps Four Eyes." Levi says.
"Yeah, and that's 21 for me Clean Freak." I say back realizing our name calling came naturally like it was a daily chore of ours we had to scratch off our to do lists.

Levi hops on the horse and offers me a hand; I am happy to oblige.
I feel his body warmth and can't help but smile thinking of all the cold things he says to Eren and Armin, what contradiction. I accidentally laugh out loud thinking of what I had imagined.
Levi looks over his shoulder and gives me his usual blank stare adding a little confusion to his face and asks,
"Oi, was there something weird in your tea?"
"Uh, no! I was just thinking of something..."
"Tch, you think a lot, must have been something really weird then."
He makes that little sound you tell a horse to go and we trot off towards South.
This time it's Levi who starts the conversation,
"So, you wanna head a few more miles and check out the plants?"
"Actually, I have no idea of how much distance we must cover before stopping. I promise you it won't be long though, I will get some sort of gut feeling when we should stop."
"You actually believe in that crap?" Levi asks.
"What do you mean?" I question raising an eyebrow.
"I mean the whole 'gut feeling' stuff? Where instead of using common sense, you go with your heart or whatever?"
I see he doesn't understand what I'm feeling, I guess since he hasn't grown up with a lot of family or love, it would make sense he wouldn't understand.

"Well Levi, what has actually helped me through my life is listening to my heart instead of my head, yeah it's a little cliché but it's true. See the difference is your head does all your logical thinking and reasoning."
We ride off in silence after that. I can hear his breathing, we were so close. I look at the back of his neck and could see he had groomed his hair this morning. Even when we are out risking our lives for Humanity's sake, he still finds the time to style his hair ever so neatly. I loved him for that...wait. Loved? No! Of Course not. Even if I did, there's no time to commit to a relationship for anybody with constantly having to put your life on the line. Plus, someone like him, and a girl like me could never be together.

"Levi, I don't think you know how to do this. Close your eyes Shorty, it's time you listen to your own feelings."

Ahhhh! Oh mah gosh!
I'm very proud of this chapter.
Guys I appreciate the little community of followers I have, it means a lot!!
I have school tomorrow ugh!
And I have to finish a science test... May Hanji be with me giving me answers XD
~yours truly