Deranged Love - Hanma Shuji

Chapter 14

My investigation on Rai was not a success.

At least not as fast as I'd have wanted it to be. All the time it took me to find out what she knew, I was starting to grow more and more convinced that I was paranoid. On Monday when the fight was happening in the basement, I could hardly focus on the tasks I had been assigned. As I was doing them, I could feel the weight of Hanma's watch in my pocket. I had to hurry and give it back to him before he could find a reason to visit me again—I couldn't allow it, not knowing how my self-control was thinning as time went on.

Of course it was one of the main reasons that kept me unfocused, but there were others. One of them being that icky feeling I was feeling all over my body ever since Ran touched me, I couldn't seem to get rid of it even after washing my face and scrubbing the places I could when in the bathroom. I hated my brain for thinking the solution to it would be to feel Hanma's touch instead, so I ignored it the best I could and instead directed my attention to Rai's behaviour. How I kept catching her looking at me throughout the day was annoying enough, but when I'd ask her what was going on she'd simply laugh nervously, adding that she was still tired from the Halloween party. "I am quite a bad drinker, I may have drank too much." She wasn't as hectic as usual, when I told her I also drank quite a lot that night she immediately jumped on the topic.

"Do you have blackouts? Did your friend get home safely? You mentioned a friend earlier, is she alright?" Curling a brow at her rapid questioning I smiled sweetly, she continued, "You were wild that night—" Suddenly she stopped when I met her gaze, not as a friend but as her boss, something I liked her to remember when she was starting to get too familiar at the workplace. She mumbled a quick apology to which I told her it was fine then explained, "My friend went home, yes. I don't have—I have a few blackouts but nothing much, mostly the end of the night more than anything." I slipped, I had almost fucked up my story. Of course I remembered everything, but when I lied to the people downstairs, Rai being one of them, I had told them a completely different story. It didn't matter now, I needed to close the topic to avoid having to lie more, meaning to remember more of my own fuck up, "I think we should refrain from having such a wild night for a while." I told her with a soft laugh, making her laugh too as she nodded. It sounded forced and not genuine but I let it slide.

We then returned to work and she seemed deep in thought for the entirety of the day. When I left the office and stepped out of the building, my arm was snatched and I was pulled to the side of the building. Before I could say anything, Hanma's voice reached my ears and I let out a sigh of relief, "That's not a nine to five job, it's almost 7. Don't overwork yourself like that," I quirked a brow at his words, unfamiliar with any sort of concern from him. He continued, "It's not fun if you fall asleep before I get home, how am I supposed to have fun?" He cooed in false care, mockingly even. His grip on my arm lessened so that his right hand could slide from my arm to my ass, holding it firmly. I didn't move it and instead looked up at him and placed my hands on his cheeks—his left hand went to grab one of my arms to pull it away, but he left the other hand there. The weird tension that had built in my body since the moment in the elevator did not fade slowly, it rapidly left, making me elated to see Hanma, to be able to touch him.

I had craved him.

I had needed him all day.

Now that I was close to him, I could let my guard down. I wanted to ask him to touch me, to let his hands roam all over my body, to do something—anything, to help with that disgusting feeling all over my body. But that'd mean admitting I enjoyed this trick of his, this manipulation he had so skillfully pulled in, making me want him every time something went wrong. That thing he had worked hard on to get me to eat from the palm of his hand.

The world seemed to stop for a moment, there was the lively city buzz happening far from us with some people talking too loudly as they walked by and the awful sound of cars and bikes speeding by. But it all seemed so far, so muffled, when we were this close to one another. Hanma wasn't moving, instead he was looking down at me with half-lidded eyes and a growing smirk, but nothing too arrogant. For now. "When Ran..." about to tell Hanma more about what had happened, the man rolled his eyes and forcefully turned us around to press my back against the wall as he used it for balance while he lifted one of my legs and pressed his form against me, "Shit, don't talk about him again." he swore under his breath. Immediately, his hands were on my shirt and he started unbuttoning it skillfully all while talking, "I made clear you were mine to play with, and he still—" The frown that had appeared as he finished undoing my shirt disappeared when he let out a chuckle and rested his chin on my head.