Guilt.

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{March 16th}

"You're a coward."

That's what his sister had told me before I left. To be honest, she wasn't wrong. I was a coward and I knew it. But her telling me that still didn't stop me from leaving. Hell, I feel guilty every second of everyday. But the sad fact was, it wouldn't matter to him anyway. He would just keep living his life, not knowing any different. And that was okay, he deserved it.

It's my fault he isn't living a normal life In the first place.

Of course, the best thing for me to do would be to leave him alone. So that's what I'm doing, but lately he's been on my mind more than usual. Maybe that was because our anniversary was coming up. I guess we were technically still in a relationship, if that's how you want to look at it. That's how his sister looked at it. But me? I didn't. After all I did, and the way I left, there was no thought in my mind that we were still together. I was just unable to break up with him at the time.

I've been living all alone for almost a year now, alone with only my thoughts about him to keep me company. Sometimes I even felt sorry for simply dreaming about him.

Wasn't it wrong?

In my mind I didn't have the right to think about him. I haven't been in contact with anyone connected with him, so I don't know what he's doing right now. Did he know about me already? Was he waiting for me to come back? Or Did he find someone new? The thought of him being with someone else created a sharp pain in my chest. Which made me feel worse. Both physically and mentally.

80% of me wanted to ask one of our mutual friends how he was doing, But the other 20% told myself it was selfish to do. Who should I listen to? My brain or my heart?.. Always listen to your Brain. That way..

No one else but you can get hurt.

Forgotten kiss ||Hyunlix<3||Where stories live. Discover now