Midnight Falls

14: Arianne

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Victor asked Carl, glaring at him.

“Why won’t ya just admit that you do read my mind?” Carl asked, ignoring the first question.

“Because I don’t!” If Victor was reading Carl’s mind, he wouldn’t be pushing as hard. Uncle doesn’t when he can tell we know he’s lying, and he lies a lot. I believed Victor, but Carl didn’t, so it didn’t matter. He had a very hard time trusting anyone and everyone, so I was supposed to fall in line with that. I know he’s just trying to protect me, but I wish he wasn’t so strict with that stuff. I wanna figure things out on my own.

“How am I supposed to believe you?” 

I had no wish to continue listening to the fight. I hear Carl and Uncle fight all the time. I walked to the next aisle over, not so far I couldn’t scream if needed but far enough so I wouldn’t hear anything but the occasional shout from them. 

I guess I wasn’t paying enough attention to my surroundings because I bumped into this lady.

“Oh, I’m…. Sorry..” I trailed, looking her over. She had long bleach blonde hair, black rimmed glasses surrounding dark gray eyes. She wore a short floral dress, showing how ill fitted it was to her form. Her face was more angular and sharp than a normal woman's. In fact, everything about her was just a tiny bit off. And… familiar…

“It’s no problem, little girl,” She said. With a jolt, I recognize that voice. That maleish-female voice. She was the one in my dream. She studied me and my reaction. “You don’t like being called that, do you?”

“Uh, being called what?” I feign ignorance, but I knew what she was talking about. Because my reaction wasn't just because I recognized her from my dream. Why don’t I like being called a girl? I am one.

“A girl. Trust me, I know that look. I wore it many times when I was your age.” Her smile was kind. Not condescending Like my uncle’s or science teacher’s. I felt she meant every word she said.

“But aren’t you a girl?” I ask carefully. Her eyes shine with joy, but she waved off my statement.

“Oh, no. I mean when people called me a boy.” I was confused. Her voice is a bit off, as is her size and features, but there’s no mistaking it. She’s a girl.

“Who would call you a boy?” Again with the flash of joy in her eyes.

“Well, I didn’t always look this way. When I was your age, I was very much a boy on the outside.” Wait what? That’s impossible! Surely she’s always been a girl… that’s how it works, right? “But, that never felt right to me.” She sighed through her nose, as if remembering the time she was a boy. If she wasn’t lying to me.

“What do you mean ‘never felt right’?”

“I mean that when I looked in the mirror, I never saw myself. And when I was called my birth gender, I hated it.” I felt weird inside. Everything she said; I’m only realizing now that I felt that. How had I not noticed before? “I’m not trying to make you confused. But seeing that look on your face reminded me of myself. I’m sorry if all this is too much-”

“So it’s possible to change like that?” I interrupt, not meaning to be rude, but my curiosity about it, the possibility of it being doable…

“Ari!” Carl called, worry coating his voice. His fight with Victor must have stopped.  “Arianne!”

“I’m over here, Carl!” I call behind me. The sound of shuffling feet and smell of fresh baked cookies told me that they were both headed towards my direction. 

“Arianne!” he called to me, appearing at the end of the aisle. Running toward me, he grabbed my hand and said something all too familiar. “Leave the nice lady alone.”

“Oh, it’s alright,” the lady assured my brother. “I don’t mind explaining things like this. Especially to questioning kids.” she winked at me in a kind way, but I could tell Carl was unnerved about it. Fair, even if we didn’t live in New York.

“Right, well thank you for watching out for my sister.”

“Of course. Stay safe.” I was being pulled away, towards where Victor was waiting. I didn’t want to go just yet. The lady didn’t answer my question and I think I have more. Everything is so confusing, and I want it to stop. “Arianne, was it?” Carl stopped for just a moment and let me turn back to her. “The answer to your question is yes.”