Reality Check

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     Butterflies , goosebumps and electricity ! These were the words Shonali had always heard in movies or read in romance novels whenever they would describe a kiss and for the first time she could understand why !

      She had felt all of them and a lot more !! Ever since Sujay had dropped her back to her hostel , she hasn't stopped smiling or thinking about him. When she reached her room , she was glad no one was there. She just wanted some time alone to gather her thoughts and that's what she did. After dropping a quick text to Palak that she won't be attending the first half of college today and that she has reached hostel safely she made a cup of tea for herself and sat near the window thinking about everything that has happened.

     On the other hand Sujay was feeling very low and vulnerable. He and Shonali stayed up all night talking about everything and anything , about the upcoming distance , about their dreams .. it was everything Sujay had hoped for ever since he fell for her. For him it was all too good to be true! And instead of being happy he was having these Monday blues . When your reality is better than your dreams you are always afraid someone might wake you up and everything will vanish , that is what Sujay was going through and there was only one person he could go to for comfort - his sister. After dropping Shonali he called Shruti and headed back towards her apartment.

"Wow!! Seems like someone got no sleep last night !" Shruti exclaimed mischievously . "I hope you guys kept it PG-13 , the balcony is visible to the neighbors you know ! " she chuckled.

          Sujay was slumped on the sofa and was half asleep when he was woken up by the doorbell . Shruti was already on her way to her office when Sujay called her this morning. She had asked him to use the spare key and make himself at home while she finishes up some urgent tasks .

      "Shut up Shruti !! " Sujay groaned. Seeing her brother this miserable in love made her chuckle. She sat down beside him and made him keep his head on her lap. Even as kids whenever Sujay was worried and tensed he would just go and lay his head in his sister's lap and vent his feelings . Instinctively she caressed his head.

"What happened Sujay ? Shouldn't you be happy she trusted you and came here with you ? " She asked.

"I know , I should be happy but I am far from that right now and I don't know why.." Sujay sighed.

"Did you tell her you love her ? " Shruti asked curiously.

"Yes and No ! I mean I told her how I feel but I just couldn't complete the sentence. She didn't let me .." he sighed , "but atleast now I know she feels something for me too !! " He smiled remembering her words.

"That's a good thing Sujay , she opened up to you ? " Shruti stated.

"Yes , I know and I also know why she didn't let me complete my sentence or why she is so adamant on not going through with this long distance. But still I just feel helpless ! " He sighed. "It feels as if I have everything yet nothing at all !"

"Maybe because she trusts you but you don't.. " Shruti sighed.

"What do you mean ? Ofcourse I trust her , why would you say that ? " Sujay was surprised his sister could draw such a conclusion.

"Well if you trust her you would have told her about our parents, your fears , why we both are the way we are .. don't you think she deserves to know your demons too ? " Shruti  tried to explain her thoughts .

"I don't know much about relationships Sujay , but I do know one thing it should always be a safe place for both the people involved. If she feels safe with you , you should feel the same around her ! It's not only about protecting the girl.. females are not the only ones who needs reassurance . And you can have that confidence around her only if you are true to her , if you have something to hide you will always have the fear of losing her ... " she tried to explain her baby brother the cause of his irrational fears.  He needed this reality check to save both him and Shonali from doom.

Sujay sat straight up and thought for a second about everything he just heard.
" Maybe you are right Shruti . I do fear if she comes to know about our family she might leave me ... "

" Are you ashamed of our parents? " She asked calmly.

" No absolutely not !! I love them alot Shruti ! Irrespective of their relationship with each other or your fight with dad they have always been the perfect parents for us .. I just don't know if Shonali will understand our family dynamics .... " He said timidly.

"If she doesn't understand you then is all this really worth it Sujay ? If she doesn't accept you after knowing your truth , is she really worth your love? ......Although knowing her I think she would definitely show you a different perspective on your life ! " Shruti chuckled while finishing her sentence.

Sujay was amused at his sister's last sentence. It seems she has more confidence on Shonali than he had . He sighed but then he realised something...

"Wait a minute!!! How do you know I haven't told Shonali about our parents and everything else ? " He looked at her curiously.

"Oh.. well.. I might have slipped my tongue on the night of your farewell party , but then I saw her expressions and realized she doesn't know anything so I changed the topic .. " Shruti said sheepishly while slowly getting up from the sofa .

"Youuu..... Why didn't you tell me earlier? " Sujay immediately got up and threw a cushion at her.
Shruti was swift in reacting as if she already knew this was coming and ran towards the dining room .
"Sorry sorry , I forgot !! Next time I will keep my mouth shut in front of her ! " She laughed

Sujay was back to being cheerful after talking to Shruti as if a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders . But he couldn't let this opportunity to get things done from his sister go...

"What would she be thinking about me !! She must be waiting for me tell her everything and here I am sitting like a fool" he was still chasing Shruti around the house.

"Ofcourse she would be thinking good things about you , otherwise she wouldn't have kissed you .." Shruti teased him.

He stopped in his tracks hearing this . His mind went back to yesterday's events , to the kiss !! He started blushing thinking about the same when he suddenly realised where he is .
"Now how do you know this ? "
He asked looking surprised "Were you spying on us ? "

Shruti was laughing hysterically at this point !
"Wow so you guys really kissed ? I just took a  wild guess ! "

" I am so not going to spare you ! " He exclaimed and continued his cushion attacks on her .

He knew he should talk to Shonali soon but with only four days left and still so much uncertainty he had no idea how to bare his heart out in front of her....for now he was happy to spend much needed time with his sister .

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