Like a ruby flower (nickloon)

.An unexpected encounter.

IK I ALREADY DID THIS BUT
here is an extra long chapter
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NICKELS POV

Fuck. I didn't- why did i say that. I didn't mean that at all, so why the fuck did i say that. I want to slam my head against the wall right now i deserve it. Im such an idiot ugh why did i say that.

Now he definitely doesn't even like me and i just fucked up my only chance of actually getting closer. I should of just told him what happened, on second thought that wouldn't have made things any better.

Ugh, i flop down onto my pillow face first and groan into it. I should of listened to soaps advice, i should of never done that yesterday and now we will probably never talk again. I hate feeling these emotions. Ever since I developed that stupid crush on balloon I've been feeling these weak emotions. I wish I could just shut it all out.

I should just move on, he'll never like me anyway. This day is so stupid, i feel something running down my face.

BALLOONS POV

I walk over to the flower field, the flowers decayed and get crushed from my feet as I'm walking over to the log. I look at the once lively field..now it looked depressing. Well this certainly didn't improve my mood.

I wipe my watery eyes as I try not to cry, even if I knew no one was here to watch me. I shouldn't even feel bad though, nickel was right we weren't friends. Even if it felt like it, I know I was probably just misreading him. I should of known me and him were never gonna be friends, or even more than that...it was really silly to believe that. I colapse onto a log.

I rest my head onto my hands and look at the ground below, it looked soft. I really didn't want to go back into my room, I'm just going to stay here for a bit, I can't face Nickel right now.

6 pm

NICKELS POV

Groaning, I get up from my bed to go down for dinner, as much as I would love to stay in my room. Eating is still important, plus after that whole fainting thing my body still needs energy.  All I've been doing is just laying in my bed thinking about..balloon. He hasn't come back into our room yet and I haven't seen him when we ate lunch, I am getting concerned but I know that he probably doesn't even want to see me right now. I head downstairs to the bottom floor.

I look around hoping to see him but to my disappointment he was nowhere to be found. Wait why do I even want to see him right now, that would just make things really awkward. Oh whatever, it's not like I need him..

I go to my table and sit down at my seat, the one next to me obviously empty. Maybe he'll still come? I don't think balloon ate all day actually, he must be hungry. Then the front door opens, I turn around to see who it was at to my surprise it was balloon, oh thank god he's okay. He walks in looking for his table but as his eyes fall on me, exchange eye contact for a second but it felt like it lasted forever before he shakes his head in frustration and heads back out. I should have known.

I continue to eat my food but at this point I lost my appetite, I just want this day to end.

A week later
2 am

Nothing has changed, all the days feel like a repeat of yesterday just a constant cycle. Eat, rest, cry and sleep. I'm so pathetic, I thought that if I just stop thinking about it I would move on but nothing helps at this point. Each day it's getting harder and harder to fall asleep, why is this happening to me? I feel tears starting to form form my eyes. Ugh not this again, I need to pull myself together. I wipe my eyes, maybe a cup of water will help

I go downstairs quietly, careful to not wake anyone up so I don't get yelled at again. I make it down at I head over to the kitchen when I saw a tall object standing there already

KNIFES POV

"Knife? Is that you?" A familiar voice calls out. I turn around to see who I was and to my surprise it was Nickel, he looked like a mess
"Nickel? What are you doing here, it's 2 am." I raise an eyebrow
"I should be asking you the same thing"
"Well answer my question first and then I'll answer yours."
"Fine, I just came here to get a cup of water" he said with and annoyed tone. Looks like someone had a bad day
"This late?"
"Yes this late." He gives me a annoyed look "now why are you here, shouldn't you be at the competition?"
"I'm just getting food, the food they give us isn't all amazing so yeah" he nods and goes to the cupboard to get a cup, I see him wipe his eye as if he was crying- wait is he upset or something, it wouldn't hurt to ask right? "Hey uh nickel? You okay?" he turns around to face me, giving me somewhat of a surprised look.
"Yeah. I'm fine, why?" he looked down at the floor and sighed, he might be a good liar but I can spot one from a mile away.
"Doesn't seem like is all" I cross my arms waiting for him to give me an answer.
"Well i am." Nickel said in a frustrated tone
"Sounds like a lie to me." I raise an eyebrow
"Okay geez fine, I'm not. Is that what you wanted to hear?!" He looks me in the eyes and said, annoyed. his eyes were shining. I stay silent for a few seconds and look down at him, his face now looking down at the floor before a little droplet falls down at the floor, he quickly rubs his eyes once again and sighs.
"Hey, if you want you can talk about it you know, I won't judge." I give him a softer tone in my voice. He thinks for a second, before answering.
"Fine, but you better not tell a soul about this, you got that?"
"Promise" I reply truthfully
He sighes and begins explaining what has been going on, he tells me that he's figured out that he's gay and that he recently got feelings for balloon. I never excepted for him to like balloon, didn't he hate him?. He goes on about how he keeps pushing balloon away accidentally and that a week ago he completely destroyed their relationship because of an argument they had. Now balloon keeps avoiding him and he doesn't even go in their room anymore. They're not talking with each other at all and nickel feels really guilty and ashamed how he's feeling all of these 'weak' emotions.
"Wait so balloon won't talk to you because you yelled how you guys weren't even friends?"
"Yeah that's what I just said, are you deaf?" I roll my eyes
"Well it seems like to me balloon wanted to be friends with you."
"What? What makes you say that?" He looks up to me in confusion, we decided to go sit on the couch.
"Think about it this way, if he didn't want to be friends he would have never gotten upset about you saying that to him, but it seems like he did and you saying that you aren't friends must of upset him. I'm just saying" his eyes lit up in realisation. But quickly changed to the same upset face
"Even if your right-"I am" it's not like it changes anything, I still ruined it and he doesn't want to talk to me. I wish I could just move on already" he says mumbling the last part.
"Hey listen it's okay to feel all these emotions, trust me I would know, after all I'm gay too. And you can still be ashamed of them but you can't just get rid of feelings. I also don't think that you completely ruined your relationship, you should try apologising or something I don't know. I doubt balloon hates you or anything."
"Talk to him!? How would I even do that, he's been avoiding me, remember? And what would I even say to him?"
"Im not sure, personally I'm not really good with those types of things you would have to just see for yourself what to say"
"Alright...just one more question." I hear a door creak open, probably the wind
"Yeah?"

??? POV

I should probably go get something to eat
I open the hotel door and peak around to check if anyone's awake apart from me. I hear two voices to my surprise, who is talking at this time? I get curious and I step in quietly, I realise it's nickel's and knife's voices that I hear. Nickel? I wonder what he's talking about, I tip toe closer and listen in.
"-should tell him?" Nickel asks
"Tell who? Balloon?" Knife questioned
"You know the answer to that"
"Hm. I don't know, see first how it goes with talking to him tomorrow, or well today because it's 2am. If you decide to though, try finding the right place and time for it. Remember don't rush things, the only thing it would do is push you guys away even more."
"hey knife...thanks."
"No problem man" I hear them getting up so I quickly get out of the hotel and back the place I was staying. I wonder what nickel wants to talk about.

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YAY OMG IM FINISHED THIS CHAPTER
I've been kinda having some ideas floating around for the ending for this book at I'm trying to decide what will happen in the next chapter
Also couple of other things, I'm planning to make it so the book is at least an 1 hours long so yeah
(1723 words)