Hyacinth (Tamlin's Healing Arc)

Chapter Thirty Six

"No Bron then?" Cin asked.

"No, but he's my first stop tomorrow," Tamlin replied. "My only stop tomorrow."

It meant something that he had left Bron for last and set aside the entire day for the conversation. "I haven't gone home to fetch my clothes. I'll need to talk to him eventually too."

"I could collect your things while I'm there tomorrow," he offered, taking a sip of his spring wine. He had bought it in Clematis, one of their strawberry-mint flavored wines.

"You're more likely to bring my entire armoire," Cin laughed. She had no doubt that Tamlin would have no clue where to begin or even if Bron would let him get that far.

Tamlin shrugged. "In the meantime...I guess...you could always wear one of my tunics."

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" she snickered, pushing the empty food plate away. Tamlin grinned, one side of his mouth tugging up, and then he upended the glass of wine.

"All done, my Lord? Ready for dessert?" Nienna asked, popping her head into the Great Hall. "Everly baked a cinnamon roll and a blueberry pudding."

"No—"

"Don't do that," Cin said quietly, trying not to let Nienna hear her chastise him. "Everly slaved in that kitchen to make you dessert. Don't do her the disservice of not eating it."

Tamlin looked completely taken aback by Cin's brazenness, and then he laughed. He rolled his head around to face Nienna directly. "We'll take a serving of each, please Nienna. And please, tell Everly to share it among the staff as well. Her supper was amazing."

"As you wish, my Lord." Nienna's head retreated, and the Hall once again filled with an eerie silence.

"You're growing confident. I don't know if that's a good thing."

"Oh, no, you don't get to regret this now. I have always been bold. Neither you nor anyone else will ever be able to give or take it from me," Cin purred. She had drunk only four glasses of wine, and somehow, she would never admit it, but it was making her braver. She was in control of her own life, making her own decisions and walking her own path toward a future of her own making.

She knew where this night would lead, where they both wanted it to go, and she wasn't going to stop it. Ever since he had given her the circlet, which she swore never to take off except for the minutes it took to wash her face and hair, she had known. It wasn't so much an exchange—the circlet for something more—as it was a decision. She had seen the question in his eyes, and throughout the entire dinner, Cin had been answering that question with her own lingering glances, subtle touches, and soft smiles.

Nienna entered with a tray, holding two servings of blueberry pudding and two slices of cinnamon roll.

"Should Bron return, would you place him back here?"

"Would you want that?" Tamlin asked. He had given a great deal of thought to who would go where if they chose to work for him again. Cin wanted to say yes; the Cauldron knew how desperately she wanted her brother to be near her. But if he was needed elsewhere, she wouldn't stand in the way. Tamlin was more than capable of making the decision, taking into account what he knew she would want.

"If he isn't needed elsewhere, I guess," she finally admitted.

"He is. But I wouldn't leave you alone here without any sort of protection, especially if I need to be away from home as often as I predict I might need to be," Tamlin replied. "If he comes back, if any of them come back, I want to test their fighting skills. If Bron stands above the rest the way I remember him to, then I'll need to prepare him to train my new sentries as they come in."

"Wouldn't that be on the estate?"

Tamlin shook his head. "There's a place between Monarda and the eastern coast that used to serve as an army community during my father's time as High Lord. It was where sentries were trained, housed, and looked after. My army was never large enough to be stationed there, and then Amarantha came...but I'm considering reopening it. During my last visit to Monarda, I surveyed the area and it's still standing, albeit rundown from years of neglect. If Bron excels in sparring, I would station him there."

Monarda was a three-day ride from the Mansion. She would see Bron even less than she did now, between her days at the Mansion and his days off hunting. But if this was what Tamlin needed for the betterment of their home, she had no choice but to accept it. The cool circlet on her brow reminded her that they all had their roles to play, and the sooner they settled into them, the better.

After finishing their desserts, they bid farewell to Nienna for the evening and left the Great Hall, heading toward the grand staircase. Vixra, as always, stood at attention beside the great oak doors in the foyer.

"Goodnight, Vixra. We'll see you in the morning," Cin said as they passed the beautiful porcelain fae.

"Of course, my Lady, my Lord," Vixra nodded to both Cin and Tamlin, then added to Cin, "I'll be alone this time."

Cin laughed, climbing the stairs. "You'll never be alone in this Mansion. There's always someone somewhere."

Vixra's soft chuckle followed them up the stairs and onto the second landing. Cin walked in silence beside Tamlin, their shoulders brushing every few steps as they drew closer to his doors. It wasn't until they reached the closed doors that Cin turned to him, fully intent on asking him to kiss her again. But before she could speak, Tamlin faced her, closed the distance between them, and kissed her.

Softly, slowly, delicately. She wanted this, she wanted him, all of him. But...what if Bron was right? Cin felt like she had been doused with a bucket of ice-cold water; the passion drained from her as tears welled up in her eyes. She couldn't walk this path, no matter how much she desired it, if there was a chance he would find his mate and leave her behind.

"Wait, maybe...maybe we shouldn't do this," she gasped against his lips, her breath catching. Every cell in her body yearned for him.

"I'm sorry," Tamlin, just as breathless, stepped back without hesitation. "I shouldn't have—"

"No, it's just..." She stumbled, searching for the words. "Your mate could still be out there. And I...I don't think I can handle being a casual fling along the way."

"This is about my mate?" Tamlin frowned deeply. When she nodded, unable to say it again, he shook his head. "Cin, I don't care about her—if she even exists. A mate is someone the Mother chooses to produce a strong Heir, and even then, there's a chance my Heir won't be among my children. You are my choice, this is my choice." He held her face between his hands, gazing deeply into her eyes. "The Mother hasn't been there for me in a really long time. Why should I allow her to make the choice about who makes me happy? About who makes me whole? This choice is mine, and I am making it, Cin. I am choosing you."

Cin blinked, and tears spilled down her cheeks. Tamlin kissed them away, one tear at a time. "I choose you, Cin. And I will keep choosing you until I'm no longer here to make that choice."

This time, when he lowered his head to kiss her, she didn't stop him. Without breaking the kiss, she let him lead her into his bedroom. Tamlin kicked the door shut behind them, and that's where they stayed all night.