Season of Death {karlnap}

Life

Hello. I feel like I write too much but I have nothing else to do with my life :p.
Everything is in Karl's pov! Unless I write at the beginning of a chapter it isn't- anyways.. ENJOY
~~

I wake up, eat, rethink all my life decisions, eat, sleep, repeat.

Hi, my names Karl Jacob, and welcome to the wonderful tales of life's a fucking lie.

I was on my bed, staring at the ceiling trying to work out why I'm still here. I soon found the answer, I'm still here because I'm giving life one last chance at getting better.

A week.

If a week passes and nothing changes I'm done with this.

I already know how I want to die.

I want to die the same place she did.

The bridge.

I tilted my head to look out the window next to my bed, it was snowing.

Winter, the season of death.

All animals hide to live, all plants under snow, suffocating them. Little kids running around making snowmen that will, in the end, melt.

All the beautiful flowers hidden, dead. Waiting for the sun to shine so they can bloom.

But there's also a good side to winter.

The warm hot chocolate, sitting next to the fire, wearing COMFORTABLE clothes, especially hoodies. And not feeling your shirt stick on your back due to the sweat.

I like winter.

I have work tomorrow.

Surprisingly, I don't hate work.

My job is at a small vintage library next to a café, the library isn't that busy, but it has enough customers to keep it up and running. It's quiet, I love the quiet.

I re-shelf books and help some people find a book suitable for them.

Im allowed to read the books, I always sit at my desk and read if I have nothing to do.

Between the pages of a book is the best place to be, besides music, reading a book pulls you out of reality.

I stared back at the ceiling.

Why did she have to die?

Why couldn't it be me?

What did I ever do to them?

How was it my fault?

Why?

Because you deserve it.

"Yeah.. I deserve it" I softly mumbled to myself.

I felt tired, when am I not?

I felt my eyelids get heavy, I let the darkness consume me.

7 days left.. life.