Chapter Fourteen

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"Come on, Vic. Just eat one fucking thing." Kellin pleaded, slapping my face with a spoon.

"Fuck off."

"He speaks!"

I scoot away from him on the couch.

"Come on Vic. You can't just fall into a depression all the time."
"Why not?"
"Because life's always going to go up and down. Either you're super happy or you're in the lowest zone. Learn to live in the grey area a bit."
"What an amazing speech. Now go away." I held my stomach again, as I inched away, making sure my ribs didn't kill me before Kellin would.
"When was the last time you ate?"
"I snuck into the fridge last night."
"So that's where all the groceries went."
I replied with silence.
"Well then, I'll stop my jokes."

Kellin walked off sadly.
I sighed. I can't stay mad at him forever.

"Kellin,"
"What."
"I dated them."
"You what?"
"Dated... just sit down.

When I was in high school, I slept around with basically every gay kid in town, and even drunk straight guys if I was drunk too. My depression basically made me want to act out sexually too. So I basically just turned into a total whore.
Well at some point, I was at a party, and I was drunk along with some guys, and one of them-Jaime- decided we should film and fuck.
Well, we did, but he posted it. Everywhere. Soon the whole school knew I was gay.
And a whore.
Mike's best friend was the guy I slept with, and Mike blamed me for his friend disowning him. Meanwhile, my parents found out. My extremely homophobic parents.
So Mike got his friends to beat me frequently.
Almost weekly I'd be beaten, and...taken advantage of. Homophobes being homosexual just to continue spitting videos out onto the web.
At some point they knocked me unconscious and left me naked out in a field, with a note saying "next you're dead".
And that's when I got home, gathered my stuff, and left for good.
And I've paranoid ever since that they'll finish me off. I want my life to end on my own terms, so I ran."

Kellin stared me in the eyes as I continued the rest of the story.

"Oh."
"Yeah."
"So, why wouldn't you tell me?"
"...I guess I just couldn't."
"Oh."
"It made me feel like an object. Ugly, disgusting object."

Moments of silence passed, and Kellin suddenly sprang towards me, crashing his lips to mine. I feverishly kissed back, and he pushed me onto my back on the couch.

"Kellin what are you-"
"Making sure you feel beautiful. Always."
"We can't just have sex to make up."
"Shhhh."
"Dont shush me."
"Shhh." He repeated.

A/N: Sorry for not updating in like... a month.
I don't have an excuse.
Lack of motivation, perhaps?
Whatever floats your boat.
-Des

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