𝐒𝐏𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒 - ★彡[ᴀʟʜᴀɪᴛʜᴀᴍ]彡★

no dice, huh?

hello everyone!
i don't particularly love talking about depressing things, but i figured that i should let you guys know about stuff and why updates have been taking so long. its rather depressing, so don't read if you aren't in the right place. :)

basically, pretty much a week or two ago, i planned on ending my own life. everything in my life was going downhill from school to friends to family, and i felt that there was no point in anything. because of this, i spent all the currency i had saved up in all of my games along with spending a lot of money. due to my actions, i am currently going through an intense period of self-loathing. even though its just a game, im really upset that i spent a half a years worth of savings for something i wasnt that passionate about.

im perfectly okay now though! i am currently sick and just had a procedure done so im
bedridden. overall im just stressed because i feel like im not saving enough money for college and im letting everyone down with everything. i essentially loathe the way i act and talk and write and every aspect of my existence at the moment lol

i might need to take a few days break from writing, as at the moment whenever i try to write for this fanfic i just get brought back into the mental state that i threw everything away and disillusioned everyone.

school and home has been hard, and i feel like people would be happier without me around—but please dont worry as its been like this for me almost my whole life. im sorry that im writing this here, i dont have any friends or family i want to share this with, and i feel like im reaching my limit. i regret everything i wasted that day, and all the savings and money and everything that i can never get back.

thank you all for the support on this fanfic. it means the world to me to have such a kind and understanding audience. i hope that you all are having a better new year than i am, and take care. also almost 1.5k followers is insane, thank you guys for everything.

<3, wasabi