Take Me Down, Professor (El Profesor #1)

Chapter 14

"B-bakit niyo po sinasabi sa akin kung sikreto ito?" tanong ko.

Hinawakan niya ang kamay ko. Bakas sa mga mata niya ang pag-asa. "Dahil may nakikita akong kabutihan sa iyong puso, Miss Alvandra. Please take care of my son. Don't break his heart."

Kabutihan? Kailan pa? All I know is I'm a bad woman.

"P-pero wala ho kaming relasyon ni Ismael," sagot ko.

Napasinghap siya at kumorte sa mukha niya ang kalungkutan. "I see. I must be wrong. Malabo na siguro ang paningin ko."

Binitiwan na niya ang kamay ko at hinayaan akong makatapos sa pagkain. Nagpaalam na siya sa akin samantalang ako naman ay nanatili sandali.

Hold on, if this hotel and that bar are in Ismael's possession...does that mean he knew everything in the first place?

Ang reservation ni Professor Sybill dito. Ang tungkol sa babaeng naroon sa room ng gabing iyon. Kaya ba pinipilit niya akong umalis? Did he try to get me away from the heartache?

Isa pa, kaya ba naroon siya sa bar noong nagpakalasing ako dahil siya talaga ang may-ari no'n? At hindi imposibleng makita siyang naroon pero ang sabi ni Mrs. Estanislao, it was a secret. Why? Is it because he is a professor?

Malalim pa rin ang pag-iisip ko kahit nang sumakay na ako sa elevator. It is Sunday today and I have no classes so I should go home first. I need to rest from the wild activities I had engaged in last night.

The door opened and to my surprise the man who will enter the elevator is Professor Sybill. He is with a woman. Nagkatinginan pa kaming saglit na para bang nag-aalinlangan siyang pumasok. Kung hindi pa siya hinila ng babae ay mukhang mas pililiin niyang tahakin ang hagdanan.

Bumigat ang paghinga ko. Muli ko na namang naramdaman ang kalungkutan. Now I can see him with a couple rings with the woman who is clinging to his arms. Totoo nga. I was just a mistress. At mas lalo akong nawawalan ng dignidad dahil doon. I am a woman but he made me feel like garbage.

Tahimik ko lang pinagmamasdan ang mga likod nila. Palihim na nakikinig sa mahihina nilang pag-uusap. Napakasakit pala talagang makita ang taong mahal mo na may kasamang iba. Hindi ako makalaban dahil wala akong karapatan. At ayokong makasira ng pamilya. Thinking that they were here, mukhang pinalipas din nila ang gabi ng magkasama. Narito ba sila para mag-celebrate? Kasabay ba ng celebration nila ang supposed to be first anniversary namin?

I heaved a sigh. A lot of things are coming to my mind again. A lot of questions. What did I do to be wasted like this?

"We should be at home now. Naghihintay na ang mga bata," sambit ng babae. Napatingala ako at pinilit na huwag mapasinghap. So, they already have kids?

I bit my lip.

"I really enjoy our time together. Minsan na lang natin masolo ang isa't isa. Thank you, Sybill, for making this plan to be with me on our fifth anniversary."

Nadurog ang puso ko. Limang taon na sila pero nagawa pa niyang lokohin ang asawa niya ng isang taon kasama ako. Kung alam ko lang, hindi ko gagawin iyon. Hindi ko ipagpipilitan ang sarili ko.

Hindi ko maiwasang makaramdam ng awa. At sa isang saglit ay nawala ang pagmamahal ko kay Professor Sybill, napalitan iyon ng galit. Kung kaya ko lang komprontahin siya ngayon ay ginawa ko na, ngunit maraming madadamay sa gagawin ko...maging ang mga anak nila.

Tumunog ang elevator. Hindi ko na hinayaan pang magtagal sa lugar na iyon and I excused myself away from them. Walang lingon-lingon.

Pumara ako ng taxi at saka sumakay bago dumeretso sa bahay ko. Weekends should be my rest days pero napuno ako ng stress dahil sa iba't ibang nangyari. But the thing is...I began to miss someone. And that someone is Ismael. I felt like I wanted to rest in his arms.

*****

Pumasok na ako sa klase and as usual, late ako. Medyo masakit ang ulo ko dahil napuyat ako kagabi. Professor Sybill was texting me nonstop and even telling me to not talk about our affair to his wife.

That really made my day worse. Hindi niya kailangang sabihin sa akin. Pagkatapos niyang wasakin ang puso ko ay may lakas ng loob pa siyang bantaan akong huwag siyang i-blackmail. Why would I even do that?

To think of it, he was also asking why I was in that hotel looking so tired. Well, I left him on seen. Let his brain run wild.

"Huy, alam niyo na ba ang issue?" rinig kong bulong ng isa sa mga kaklase ko nang makaupo ako sa upuan ko. They are seated at the back of my chair kaya naririnig ko ang mga pinag-uusapan nila.

"What issue?"

"Professor Mondalla was seen in a bar last Saturday night. Kaya pala siya pinapasok kahapon nang maaga to explain."

"And why would they ask him about that? It was his private life. Ano naman kung nasa bar siya?"

"Because he was seen with a student. Ang sabi nila tagarito raw sa Marcus University."

Natigilan ako. Did they see us? Are they talking about me?

"Same issue with Professor Sybill before. Sabi din ng source, naroon din daw si Professor Sybill sa bar nung Saturday but he was with his wife so, technically, the issues about him being a womanizer were false. He is a faithful husband. And the deal here is Professor Mondalla is victimizing a student to satisfy his hunger for lust."

Napatayo ako sa narinig ko at tiningnan sila nang masama habang nakataas ang kilay. Tiningnan din nila ako. Kapwa gulat at may takot. How can they talk so much about a man they did not know well? Hindi ko alam but I was hurt hearing those baseless accusations.

"Shut up if you're just spitting out nonsense," matigas kong sabi sa kanila.

"Why? Are you affected? Are you the girl who was with Professor Mondalla last Saturday night?"

Napatingin ako sa nagsalita. Who else? It was Savannah. So she was listening to them?

Lumapit siya sa akin. "Are you the reason why our Calculus professor will be changed again?"

Napalunok ako. Because of what she said, natauhan ako. What I did would stain Ismael's profile and surely his records here will be affected. At ang ipinangako ko sa kaniyang hindi ako magiging sagabal ay mukhang nabali ko na. Because of the burst of my emotions, I get him involved in my mess. May nakakita pa sa amin.

"Bakit hindi ka nakapagsalita? Are you hurt? Sabagay, bakit ka nga naman ba papatulan ni Professor Mondalla? Of course it wasn't you he was with kung totoo man ang issue. He loathed you," litanya pa niya bago bumalik sa kaniyang upuan.

The moment she said that was the beginning of my anxiety. I can't help but admit that I am starting to be concerned about Ismael. Clearly, because of my mess siya ang dehado. All he wanted was to stay here but because of my selfishness and foolishness towards the man who never sees my worth, Ismael is being the victim of all of my mess.

Hindi ko mapigilang mahiya. I should probably distance myself from him now.

I picked up my bag and decided to leave the room pero napatigil ako sa paglakad nang makasalubong ko siya—ang lalaking dapat kong iwasan.

Natunaw ang puso ko nang makita ang mukha niya. Nanghina ako. Para bang kinukuha ng puso ko ang lahat ng lakas ko...para tumibok nang ganito kabilis.

"Where are you going Miss Alvandra?"