Parallel

Teaser

"I have late night conversations with the moon, he tells me about the sun and I tell him about you."
~ S.L. Gray

***
Tonight may be our rehearsal dinner but it doesn't feels like it. I am anticipating the arrival of the man I wanted to see the least, or never! And to top it all, I cannot tell anyone else about how I'm feeling. Not only that no one knew about us, but what do I tell them anyway? That the adopted brother of my fiancé is my ex fiancé who stood me up on what was supposed to be our wedding day?

This is so fucking messed up! I am sure as hell that he read the invitation already! And how stupid am I to not even bother to pay any attention to any single detail of this wedding, my wedding. And as I take my seat, I noticed that the one on my left side is empty. Shit. Please tell me they didn't reserved it for him.

'Hon? Okay lang, sa tabi mo si Kuya? I owe him my life Hon. Gusto ko sana bago yung wedding, okay kayo sa isa't isa. Please?'

Okay kami sa isa't isa? We are far from being okay! Your brother ditched me for reasons I don't even know! Okay is the last word that anybody should be using with regards to him and I when we are to be put in the same sentence! Tang ina! I cannot even love you because of how damaged I am because of him! Okay? Okay my ass!

"Sure. As long as it's okay with him, I'm cool."
'Okay with me? Are you two talking about me?'

FUCK. I haven't heard his voice for three years! Let alone be in the same space, breathe the same air and share the same meal! This feels so familiar yet so foreign.

'Kuya! Kuya Greggy! Finally! Meet Irene, my soon to be wife. Hon? Kuya ko. My savior and my best friend. Si Kuya Greggy.'

He extends his hand to me, to which I am very reluctant to accept. But I did anyway. People are looking at us and I know that it will spark talks and confusion if I declined. I don't want to look impolite. But when I did, I feel like someone is sending shockwaves through my system. I can't look at him. His presence alone is too much.

'Hi.'
"Hello. Take your seat, para maka kain na. You're late in case you failed to notice that."

'Hon.. it's okay.'

It's not okay. He was never late! In all of my recitals, plays and rehearsals, he was never late! All of those late nights sessions and practice that I have to attend to, he was always on time to pick me up! He always showed up on time! He never made me wait. He's always so patient in waiting for me.

Except for the last time. I waited for him until I can no longer take the pain. And up until now? I'm still waiting for the closure I never received.

Why didn't he come?
Why was he not there?
Why he left me without saying anything?
Why? Just why?

Why even after all of the pain that he caused me, I am still in love with him? Why can't my heart just let him go?

'Sorry, Irene. But I'm here already. Nandito na ako. Sa tabi mo. Nandito na ako Rene.'

I turn to look at him and he's already looking at me. I can't cry. I must not cry! So I just take my seat once again. Patrick gave the cue for the host to start the program for tonight. It's not really a formal one. Just an opportunity for both families to break the ice and get acquainted before the big day.

They dimmed the lights as kickstart the night. And that's when I felt him holding my hand. No one can ever saw what's happening. It's under the table and Patrick's too occupied to even notice.

'Miss na miss na kita Bub. Miss na miss.'