E + N

Afterglow

Afterglow - Taylor Swift

I blew things out of proportion, now you're blue
Put you in jail for something you didn't do
I pinned your hands behind your back, oh
Thought I had reason to attack, but no

Fighting with a true love is boxing with no gloves
Chemistry 'til it blows up, 'til there's no us
Why'd I have to break what I love so much?
It's on your face, and I'm to blame, I need to say
Hey
It's all me in my head
I'm the one who burned us down
But it's not what I meant
Sorry that I hurt you
I don't wanna do, I don't wanna do this to you
I don't wanna lose, I don't wanna lose this with you
I need to say, hey
It's all me, just don't go
Meet me in the afterglow
It's so excruciating to see you low
Just wanna lift you up and not let you go
This ultraviolet morning light below
Tells me this love is worth the fight, oh
I lived like an island, punished you with silence
Went off like sirens, just crying
Why'd I have to break what I love so much?
It's on your face, don't walk away, I need to say
Hey
It's all me in my head
I'm the one who burned us down
But it's not what I meant
I'm sorry that I hurt you
I don't wanna do, I don't wanna do this to you
I don't wanna lose, I don't wanna lose this with you
I need to say, hey
It's all me, just don't go
Meet me in the afterglow
Tell me that you're still mine
Tell me that we'll be just fine
Even when I lose my mind
I need to say
Tell me that it's not my fault
Tell me that I'm all you want
Even when I break your heart
I need to say, hey
It's all me in my head
I'm the one who burned us down
But it's not what I meant
Sorry that I hurt you
I don't wanna do, I don't wanna do this to you
I don't wanna lose, I don't wanna lose this with you
I need to say, hey
It's all me, just don't go
Meet me in the afterglow
________________________________________________________________________________
Noah's POV

God, I'm such an idiot. This whole trip has been a total shit show. First Elle kissing that douchebag Marco, Thanksgiving dinner turning into a metaphorical bare-knuckle boxing match, not just between Elle and me but Lee and Rachel too, then the confrontation with the aforementioned douchebag at the homecoming game after flaunting Chloe in Elle's face just to give her a taste of her own medicine. Fun fact, it just made me feel worse. I guess it's true when people say two wrongs don't make a right, but it's too late, the damage is done, and I haven't spoken to Elle since Thursday's blowup and now I'm waiting in the airport terminal for my flight back to Boston. I planned to stay a few more days since I haven't seen my family in months and to hopefully spend time with Elle figuring out how to handle the distance better and reassure her I'm still very much committed but for obvious reasons, I can't get back to Boston soon enough.

So here I am, watching a slideshow of pictures and videos of my relationship with Elle, complete with sad music, missing her like crazy but being too stubborn to admit it out loud. I just can't believe it's over, it feels like a waking nightmare knowing what I could have but being too pigheaded to fix it. So I'm not perfect, sue me. I wouldn't even know what to say if I'm being honest. I said some pretty shitty things to her and considering she thinks I've been cheating on her all this time, I wouldn't blame her if she didn't want to speak to me. I'm still fucking furious about her kissing Marco, but I haven't exactly been the boyfriend of the year. I've been distant, pushing her away while I sorted out my shit with school, coupled with the whole Chloe situation, I can see how vulnerable that left her. Way to go, Noah, I knew we would fuck this up one way or another.

I'm pulled back to the present by Chloe's voice.

"Everyone in this entire airport can see that you are absolutely miserable," she tells me. "You obviously want Elle. So, as your friend, I demand that you do something about it."