Desolate [Pokémon Arven x Protagonist]

Untold Anxiety and Embarrassment

I think that was the fastest I've ever fallen asleep. Every night away from home was a little easier, but that night felt significantly different. Our Pokémon spent the night in their Pokéballs to rest up for the brutal final battle coming, so the lack of movement and shuffling should've been nerve-racking, but it wasn't. I could feel Arven's resting heart and his slow breathing on my back. His arms around my stomach didn't make me feel trapped; it made me feel protected, like a suit of armor against my prodding thoughts. The quiet in my mind was relieving, and the feeling of someone being there for me was everything I wanted.

I woke up as Arven lifted himself up from the bed, me being a light sleeper. "I'm sorry! Did I wake you up?" Arven apologized, his voice still foggy with sleep. He was a wreck, looking like he walked through the Asado Desert on a windy day, but it was oddly comforting. I had never seen him so disheveled and unprofessional. He was so relaxed and vulnerable with me, especially the night before when he finally told me how Mabosstiff got hurt. I wanted to be vulnerable with him. I trusted him, but I was so afraid to be left behind, at long last having something that always made me happy. I didn't want to lose that.

"I'm a light sleeper," I yawned, stretching my arms over my head. "I'm awake."

Arven held one of my hands apologetically. "Let me at least get you breakfast."

I smiled at his cute, regretful expression. "Breakfast is downstairs. I could go down there myself." The cafeteria was in the lobby on the first floor. The kitchen opened early to serve hot and fresh breakfast to the hotel's guests and didn't shut down until lunchtime.

Arven let go and let his arms swing at his side awkwardly. "Just let me get you breakfast. You've done so much for me, and I haven't treated you too well." I watched his hands sway back and forth and thought up a crazy idea. I wasn't sure if I wanted to go through with it so soon into our relationship, but I wanted to take a risk like Director Clavell told us to do.

I hooked one of his fingers with my own as it oscillated towards me and pulled him closer, his hand curved at my collarbone. He was too stunned to react, letting me play with his fingers as he watched, dumbfounded, a stupid, confused but curious look on his face. "You don't realize how much you've done for me," I said, staring at our hands, not making eye contact, terrified of my own plan. "You don't owe me anything. You used to be a jerk, yes, but you make me so happy." I finally looked him in the eyes. He was still in shock, a blush starting to form on his cheeks. He was fixed on our hands on my chest. "You don't need to do anything to make up for that." I brought his hand up to my lips, and he flicked his eyes to stare at mine, shocked, and I heard him audibly gasp in his chest as I kissed the bends of his knuckles, not looking away. Arven went full red, jaw agape, frozen in time. I also realized what I had done and felt my own face grow hot. I dropped his hand and he stumbled a bit backwards. Why'd I do that? Why'd I do that?

"I—uh—I'm gonna get you breakfast," Arven stammered, hiding his face and turning to leave the room as fast as possible.

"Um, yeah, uh, thank you!" I stuttered after him, and he fastened the door shut, disappearing into the hallway. I fell back into the bed and groaned, hands over my eyes. They were still warm from holding Arven's. "That was so stupid...." I whined.

Lycanroc burst out of his ball, hearing me stressing out, and jumped onto my bed to cuddle me. I sat up, spitting out Lycanroc's long chest fur that made its way into my mouth. "Be careful where you're laying," I laughed and petted the happy Pokémon all over. I hugged his fluffy mane and sighed. "I'm not good at this relationship thing. Was kissing his hand too much?" Lycanroc licked my face with a wet tongue, and I shoved him away. "Of course, you wouldn't get it. You're affectionate towards everyone." I laid back down, elbows bent and resting the backs of my hands on my forehead. "I've never liked someone as much as I liked him. I'm afraid to mess things up. What if I go too fast? Will he be too frightened and back out? And what if I go too slow? Will he get bored and lose interest?" I reached out to grab a pillow and suffocated another frustrated groan with it. I heard someone come out of their Pokéball and then a beaky nibble at my socks.