DECEMBER 8 '84
we were at a party in Vince's house, I'm still not sure why. i slowly help Mick onto the couch, him groaning as i do so "you alright mick?" Tommy asks on a couch near us. "yeah. my back hurts from carrying this band all tour." Tommy laughed with Razzle about that comment. oh news, me and Mick are dating now, as of 2 months.
Nikki was getting every bit of his coke and i was having a blunt when we caught our eyes on Vince talking to some girl. "mick, azure" Nikki says as he points in the direction of them. he then puts his hands on his chest as if he were to have boobs. "hey, are you in the band?" Mick laughs and then pretends to mimic Vince. "what do you fucking think?" all three of us laughed.
then Tom joins in, also mimicking Vince. "Have you met my wife, Sharise? do you wanna have a threesome?" we all stop laughing and judge him. "dude, shes pregnant." i say with disgust
"dont be a fucking dick, zutaut." mick says as he lays his head on my lap and i take a drag of my blunt and stroke his hair. after 30 minutes of talking with Nikki, i decied to head home. "hey mick?" i shook him slightly. "I'm going home. you are coming with me or is someone dropping you?" I asked and he slowly adjusted to the light. "I'm coming with." i grab his hand slowly stand him up and walk out the door to the car.
i drove home and kicked off my shoes and was greeted by our cat, dan. "hi baby" i coo at him as he meows and follows us towards out room. i strip everything and get into one of Mick's shirts and get into bed.
fuck. Razzle was dead. Mick woke me up urgently and told me to go listen to the radio in our kitchen. Vince was in a car crash with Razzle, killing only Razzle. Vince was arrested for drunk driving and vehicular manslaughter. i sit at the table with the coffee Mick made for me in my hands, in utter shock.
he was sentenced to 30 days in jail. oh hi Nikki. but only served 19 on the condition he'd stay sober.
vince was my bandmate, my best friend, my brother. and i didn't call. i didn't visit. i didn't support him in any way whatsoever. why wasn't i there for him? it was simple. i'd fallen head over heels in love and she was the sweetest thing i'd ever known. she made me feel the warmth and happiness i never knew as a child. her name was Heroin.
'85
we were in the recording studio, waiting for vince. he got out about 3 months ago. me and Mick on the couch, drinking vodka. Nikki high as fuck beside us. and Tommy banging his drums so loud, with his head. Tommy started playing a lovely melody on the piano, making me lift my head up.
the door opened and we looked up to see Vince standing there. the tension between everyone was so thick and rough it hurt my eyes. Nikki gave Vince fucking smack, instead of coke. Vince kicks the table. he walked off in a rage. "nice job, Nikki" Mick says as he puts on his glasses and lights my smoke.
the craziest thing about all this.... is that i thought it was Vince who was fucking up the band.
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we were performing our new album, Tommy had a new girlfriend, Heather locklear, I had seen her on tv before, not sure where. I liked her, shes pretty, shes smart and nice. i just hope tommy doesn't fuck it up. Mick and I were at the front of the stage, drinking vodka. when Tommy and Nikki come over. "i think i'm in love, Mick." Mick patted his chest. "me too, you fucking teenager." he smiled at him, for once.
i turn around to see Skylar crying for her mom when Vince holds her. i feel quite bad. "is it bring your fucking girlfriend to work day?" Nikki jokes. "Don't count if i work here." i slap his knee in a playful way.
we were on the plane to our next destination, i was in the bed just sniffing some coke. i heard the door open and I looked up to see mick, holding a vodka bottle, i offered some coke but he declined. "hey baby" he groans as he comes down on the bed next. "hey" i say after I snorted my last line. i look at him with a smile. How are you?" i ask him, looking in his eyes and stroking his arm. "eh, just bored." i got an idea in my head, an idea that is totally the coke taking effect.
i sit up and straddle Mick. he seemed surprised then realized what was happening. "oh, i can get on board with this." he says as he places his hands on my hips, i leant down and kissed him, the kiss becoming heated.
'86
it was the day of Tommy's wedding with Heather. i was in her hotel room, calming her down as she got cold feet. "what if I regret this?" she paced around her room. i was sat on the couch in front of her, having a cigarette, trying not to get ashes in my dress. and her mother wasn't much help.
"you are gonna regret it." her mother said. i looked at her with an expression I can't describe. i put my cigarette in the ash tray in front of me and walked up to heather, sropping her from pacing. "heather, i've known Tommy for 5 years? he is the biggest hopless romantic, i've ever met, this is not a bad decision, and don't let that bitch over there tell you any different." i said with a straight face to her. a smile slowly made her way on her face.
"thank you!" she cried out and hugged me. i just stood there, not much of a hugger.
"come on, guys. pictures!" tommy said as we all gathered after the ceremony to take pictures. i stood in between Mick and heather. it was obvious to anyone that Nikki was shooting up.
