DECEMBER 23RD '87
I was at home, waiting for mick, he had gone to the shop down the road, to get some food. i sat at the kitchen table smoking a cig while listening to the radio, You remember my friend James? yeah well his band blew up! but sadly he lost a band member who was very close to him. anyways, he was on the radio, the thing that should not be, from their master of puppets album, great song.
i was drinking my coffee, making my hands multitask with the mug and the cig in hand. i heard the door open and walked in Mick with a plastic bag in his hand. "hey." he says as he walks over and kisses my head. "you okay?" he notices I'm just staring ,barely conscious, at a certain spot on the table. "huh?" i say as i snap out of it. "you were doing it again? Is something wrong?" he asks as he puts the bag on the table, taking out a pack of my favorite smokes.
"Yeah I'm fine, just lost in thought." i say as i take a drag of my nearly put out cigarette before getting rid of it in the ash tray. i take a sip of my nearly cold coffee and watch as Mick tries to sit down, as an immediate reaction, i go to stand up to help him. "I'm okay, i got it" he dismisses me so i sit back down.
i lit another smoke in my hand and took a drag, it's a filthy habit i just can't stop. "...in other words, Motley crue" i hear quietly from the radio. i reach over and turn it up. "Motley crue's bassist, Nikki sixx, is dead, the man was reported dead from an overdose in the franklin plaza hotel, sally McLaughlin, girlfriend of Slash from guns and roses, she gave him mouth to mouth while someone called 911"
i feel a tear get clogged in my eye, making it hard to see, not Nikki, i can't lose Nikki. i let out a full on ugly cry and crumble to the floor. Mick gets down on the floor and hugs me rocking me back and forth while i cry into his arms for a half an hour.
"he's not gone" i try convince myself, but like a dream, i hear the radio. "Motley crue's bassist, Nikki Sixx, was reported dead from an overdose tonight, but in the ambulance a sudden turn of events cause Sixx to become alive again."
i lift my head up and look at Mick. "oh my god" i punch the cabinet beside me. "fucking dickhead." i will actually kill him.
88'
Nikki did the hardest thing he has ever had to do, go to rehab, but ended up asking us if we could go. i said yes, immediately, but the boys were reluctant but with a quick threaten, they agreed.
you wanna know what rehab was really like? oh hey Vince. feelings and crying and apologies. this is my second time, trust me, it's a drag. you don't wanna see any of that shit.
but hey, it got us into the studio, so I'm not complaining.
89'
we were recording a song, "dr. feel good" i love it. we all sat outside the recording booth.
Mick and i couldn't be happier, Tommy was still with Heather, Vince still had some issues with Sharise but Skylar was still just the cutest. and i'm still not sure about Nikki.
it's all a blur. but with "dr. feel good" we got our first number one album. and i think we played something like a billion shows to a billion people in a billion cites all over the world.
thanks mick, Nikki wanted us to be completely sober. no alcohol, no weed, no coke. i'm going mad. Vince is getting mad.
Tommy walked away to call heather but came back shortly after. "guys i fucked up. Heathers been all weird and distant and i drank. well, a little. i had one shot and i'm sorry." Tommy confessed as soon as he sat down.
"i'm gonna have a fucking cocktail too. what are you gonna do about it Nikki?" Vince argued. i was scratching my hand in agony.
"do you wanna go have sex in the bathroom?" i hear Mick whisper in my ear. i stand up and so does Mick. "we're gonna go, we'll be back in 10 minutes." i feel a nudge from Mick in my side. "20 minutes" another nudge. "30 minutes" i didn't feel one so i pulled him with me to the bathrooms.
-
after the tour ended, we were all in the studio together, waiting on Vince as pure usual. Tommy suggested we change our front man.
me and Mick watched silently as Nikki and Tommy basically fight it out. i feel guilty, i feel off the wagon, more then twice. it's a horrible feeling.
"Sabbath. Fax paper this bitch!" Tommy shouted as i go over as do as i'm told. after about 20 minutes, Vince comes to the studio, causing a huge argument and Vince quitting.
92'
i didn't wanna replace him, but we have no other choice. John Corabi is our new front man, he's not bad, i just personally don't think he's better or the same as Vince.
they were shit talking Vince on tv. i stay in contact with Vince, i actually got closer to Vince when he left the band, he told me everything, everything with Skylar and how she was doing.
we did an interview with MTV and when i get home, i get a call, It was Vince.
"Sabbath, she's got cancer." he says crying his eyes out. "who, who's got cancer?" all i can hear is a sob behind the phone. "Skylar." my face immediately drops and i see an concerned Mick beside me. "are you at the hospital?" he hums an a answer that is yes.
"don't go anywhere,i'm on the way." i say as i put down the phone and put on my shoes. "where are you going?" Mick asks
