That feeling still hasn't gone away. The same one from before. Jealousy and love. They coexist with each other. There was no love without jealousy, and there was no jealousy without love, romantic or not.
Sometimes, Mark felt guilty for liking Donghyuck. Those were just the thoughts he had. Because he out of all people liked Donghyuck. Donghyuck wasn't the problem, but it was him. He felt bad for liking men and women. More specifically, men.
Everything was so frustrating, and he had no one. Absolutely nobody to talk to about it.
Mark grabbed his guitar and started playing it. Music was his distraction. He loved to strum his guitar to throw all of his thoughts away. It made him feel at peace. But soon, that peace was interrupted by a knock on the door.
He put down his guitar and hoped deep down inside that the person standing on the other side of the door was Donghyuck. But he pushed that hope down even deeper. He knew he shouldn't have hopes like that.
He opened the door to his room and was greeted with a hug. "Sunshine?"
"Mark, I broke up with him." Those words shocked him. He brought Donghyuck into his room, closed the door, and wrapped his arms around his new found crush's waist.
"Are you okay, Donghyuck?" he asked. His friend buried his head further into Mark's neck. Mark rubbed his back up and down. "Wanna tell me about it?"
Donghyuck nodded his head and looked up at him. Then he started, "Well, Renjun was always really possessive and jealous. I talked to him about it before but he wouldn't listen. Then he started accusing me of cheating on him and stuff." He sighed before continuing, "I got really tired of all of it and decided to break up with him. He told me I was just being dramatic and that I couldn't break up with him. He said he wouldn't allow me to. But i told him that we're over and I left. Then I came here. I don't know why. But I did."
"Well, he sounds like a real bitch. Don't worry though. I'm sure there will be someone better for you that will love you in a way that you deserve. You're sweet, after all."
"Yeah, I guess you're right," he said then he walked over to Mark's bed. Donghyuck started humming a tune which made Mark smile. His humming was as beautiful as he was.
Mark sat next to him and he stopped humming. "Why stop?"
"Dunno," he flatly responded. Then Donghyuck looked at him. "Mark."
"Hm?"
"I don't know what to ask. I just wanted to say your name. It sounds nice. Mark, Mark, Mark, Mark~"
"It only sounds nice because you're the one saying it," he said, falling back on his bed.
"Oh, Mark is flirting. Trying to get some right after I broke up?" he teased.
"Maybe I am. I wouldn't mind," he said. Donghyuck chuckled and it made Mark crazy. He loved his little laugh.
"So when's our little duet, Hyuck?"
"Soon, Mark. Very soon." They smiled at each other. Mark started thinking about how everything about Donghyuck was great. But he started thinking. A lot.
He couldn't be gay or bisexual. What about his family? What would they think? What would Johnny think? He was frustrated with himself. Donghyuck was kind, cute, handsome, everything. Donghyuck was everything he could ever want. But he didn't know if it was right for him to feel that way.
"Mark, you good?" Donghyuck snapped his fingers in front of Mark's face to grab his attention.
"Oh, yeah. I'm just thinking."
"About what?" he asked.
"Just about scool stuff." Donghyuck hummed and lay down in Mark's bed.
"Well, here's a good thing. Now we can spend more time together. Plus, you can even meet my friends."
"I get kind of...shy. So introduce me to your friends one at a time, please."
"Sure!" Haechan complied happily. Mark smiled. He felt like Donghyuck just understood him and didn't judge him. He felt so comfortable with Donghyuck.
"Hey, Hyuck?" He hummed in response. "If you could do anything right now, what would you do?" Mark asked while looking at the ceiling.
The older boy could feel his friend staring at him. "Anything? Well, I would be here with you talking about random stuff."
Mark's face felt hot again. Something that happened often now that he was around Donghyuck more.
"Mark," he tugged the hem of his shirt, "I need another hug." Mark pulled him close to him and wrapped his arms around his body. He didn't say anything. After all, actions speak louder than words, right?
