Querencia

49

"You know you can cry, Hana."

"I won't."

The stern answer given had left Kevin's mouth tightly sealed. Instead, he silently trailed after her, suddenly feeling scared to voice out his opinion.

However, judging from the back that he was looking at, her answer did not sync with her actions. The way she kept wiping her palm against her dress, every so often staring up to the wide sky, Kevin was able to expect the worst.

"Hana", he reached for her wrist. She halfway turned on her heels which Kevin now was viewing on her side profile that soon would break the boy's heart.

Under the moonlight above the garden they occupied, the strand of hairs she pushed back behind her ear made her jawline prominent. Right there, a loner tear rolled down her cheek.

It was full of sadness - he could tell, yet Hana was still holding back the feeling, not intending to let it show.

When Kevin reached for his handkerchief to wipe the dampness under her eye, Hana could not handle it any further, her tears rolled down like a waterfall.

The boy was dying to hold her in his arms, maybe rubbing comforting circles on her back but he knew the consequences of being selfish. She would probably feel uncomfortable by his actions which served no good for their relationship.

And so, Kevin bit the inside of his cheek, holding back the desire burning. His palm was placed on her covered arm - rubbing it, hoping that the warmth spread could have encouraged her to keep going despite the heartbreak she felt.

"Why must he give me such hope if he's going to break me?" her sobbing became clearer, threatening Kevin to mirror her as well.

He let her vent out everything that welled up in her chest without leaving even a small detail behind. For he knew, what she needed right now was nothing but a listener.

"I am furious", he said at last, when the girl seemed to have calmed a bit, wiping her eyes with Kevin's handkerchief. "Heiji has violated the deal. She is not supposed to come near you."

At that, Hana chuckled, sniffling in between.

"Did you think someone like her would obey every word you said?"

She looked at him painfully, her eyes were bloodshot. The thought that Heiji was now dancing with Juyeon on the dance floor hurt her. She wished she could leave the party without any traces.

"Wanna go home?" Kevin questioned as if he was a mind reader. "You don't have to go inside again if it hurts you."

Sucking in a deep breath, Hana looked up to the sky which resembled a wide canvas with white dots spread on it. She remembered stargazing with Juyeon once, hoping that one day she would do it again with him - as more than a friend.

But, the future was not always predictable.

Who knows now, she was a crying mess because of the certain boy. Another boy who sincerely loved her but got rejected did not even argue to stay with her.

Was this a punishment for her?

"We're gonna stay", Hana announced bravely, the sadness that was once in her eyes had been replaced with a questionable stare yet could not be deciphered. "Heiji wants me to break down, but I'm gonna prove to her, that I'm not affected."

This side of her never once failed to amuse Kevin. He respected her for being strong, for being a character that had never wavered through how hard the challenges had come into her life.

However, Kevin should have known that she was never strong when it came to Juyeon.

In a room full of people - some were chatting, some were eating, some were dancing and some were playing around, Hana looked like a mad woman in the bar, trying to get drunk. What differed her was only the drink she consumed - soda.