Hurt [제크훈] ᴇɴ-

16. Denial

"I want a divorce."

The figure in front of Jake didn't hold a threatening expression this time. But this moment, Sunghoon just stared blankly at him. Deep into his soul.

Feeling of frighten crept onto Jake's body. And Sunghoon's eyes were devouring Jake's soul. The latter retrieved slowly from Sunghoon.

"Sunghoon..."

"Shut up! Don't call my name! Peer at yourself... I'm so disgusted with you, Jake."

"Please Sunghoon...! Listen to me!"

"I was never your husband. I'll never be your husband."

Jake took his first step toward Sunghoon. But feeling the sensation of dread, he stood frozen still on the first step. Gulping few more times, gathering his courage to speak.

"Sunghoon is my husband! You are my husband!"

Wake up!

And again, Jake gained his conscious from that dreadful slumber. The nightmares were once again present in his dream. But this time, he was more curious rather than being scared.

Slowly, he brought his hand on his heart. He felt his heart was pounding vigorously. Furthermore, his breath hitched every second he tried to breath.

The room was vacant. It was just last night Jake felt the room filled with presences. He tried to leave the bed. But once he did, he fell harshly onto the hard floor.

"Ack...!"

Then, there's footsteps running toward his room. And suddenly the room swung open with all his family members checking on him.

"Jake!" Mrs. Shim hugged the latter tightly.

Jake hadn't seen Sunghoon since yesterday. The latter hadn't came back home either. Even with in the midst of his family members sitting there beside him, he couldn't help but to feel lonely.

"I stink. I think I should take a shower."

With that remark, everyone understood and left.

Jake turned on the shower. The hot water ran through his built figure. To ease his mind, he let the shower ran for few minutes.

The feeling of stuck in the middle was really draining him recently. Albeit Sunghoon wasn't always be there for him, but the feeling of guilt always build up in his heart. But he couldn't crowd his mind with that. It was just too tiring.

And when Jake finished showering, he continued to lie down on the soft mattress. Therefore, he stared at the now familiar patterns on the ceiling. There's a massive void in his heart and mind.

The senses were dulled. Not until Jake heard a cough beside him. Startled by the sudden voice, he turned his head to met with someone he recognised.

"Heeseung! You always scare me!"

Jake settled himself down on the mattress. And now, he was facing Heeseung.

"Is the ceiling look that interesting?"

"I'm sorry. How long have you been sitting there?"

Heeseung just shook his head and stood up. Opening the curtains, Jake covered himself in the thick duvet ince again.

"Quite some minutes. Eunbyeol and I wanted to tell that your parents are going back. You however were so deep in thoughts," Heeseung explained at the latter.

How can I not notice he's inside?! It was so embarrassing...!

"Jake! My best friend!"

Sunoo swung open the door. His expression was filled with concern. Without much thinking, he pushed Heeseung out of his way and sat beside Jake.

"I heard what happened yesterday. Are you okay? I shouldn't have left you alone! Now I feel guilty!"

Sunoo's eyes glistened. He was on the verge of crying.

"Sunoo... I'm the one who told you to go home. Don't put the blame on yourself."

"But..."

"No but."

"But you need to be sorry to me!" Heeseung suddenly interrupted. He tried to stand, with his hands brushing off the dust on his shirt.

"Where's Sunghoon?" Sunoo queried.

"..."

Jake couldn't answer that simple query.

"Jake... Let's be real here. We all know you are hurting and it's best for you to divorce. Live your life on your own," Jake could sense the disappointment in Heeseung's voice.

"Yeah! I agreed! It was just two months ago you married him, and look at your state now!"

Jake didn't know what triggered him. His heart suddenly beating so fast. Every second was a torture for him to breath.

"My pills...!"

It wasn't clear. They couldn't hear him well.

"Front door desk."

"Eunbyeol! Check the front door desk! Is there a packer bottle?!"

They could hear the footsteps sprinting toward the front door.

"No! There wasn't any!"

Out of sudden, Jake fell onto the ground once again. It was extremely hard for him to breath. The sight rose panic between Heeseung and Sunoo.

"We need to get him to hospital immediately!"

After twenty minutes of anxiously watching Jake breathing harshly, they finally reached the hospital. Jake was sent to his ward swiftly.

Heeseung ran cold as he encountered the scene. Never ever Jake was in this state. His mind was crowded with numerous thoughts. And now, it had been hours since Jake was sent into his ward. They had been sitting on the hard metal bench.

And after three hours, finally a doctor came to them.

"Shim Jake?"

"Us!"

"You can check on him now."

And thus, Sunoo navigated their way to Jake's ward. He anxiously sprinted toward the familiar place. And when he swung open the door, Jake had already sat on his favourite place. The window that showed the vast view of the city.

"Jake!"

Jake turned his head. He shone and idyllic smile toward the three figures. And then, he stood up, walking toward them. Right before he reached them, he fell on to his knees, crying.

"I'm sorry..."

"Jake..." Heeseung approached the guy.

"I'm a nuisance in this world. I made everyone worries about me," Jake remarked.

It wasn't true. Jake wasn't a nuisance. But he labelled himself as one because he thought so.

"I think I'm going to die soon..."

"Jake! Don't talk nonsense! You won't die."

Sobs echoed in the room. Jake couldn't bring himself to face his friends.

"Doctor said I need to search for organ donor soon. If not, I'll die."

"No... No... They didn't say that!"

All of them fell into a denial. This can't be true. Jake would survive. He needed to survive.

But Jake, he just cried on the cold tiles. His sobs getting louder and louder every second. The more he talked, the more it sounded muffled. Up to the point, three of them couldn't understand what Jake's saying.