Wrong about affection KZ/BM

Duo Dance

July 23 2017
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"Good morning," said Matt in a groggy voice. "Morning" I replied, not looking up from my laptop. "Work this early?" he yawned. "Mhmm, got to stay on top.. There's coffee in the pot. Hurry and get ready, we have to be in the studio in 30 minutes." he hums and complies, grabbing a mug and pouring the scalding brown liquid into it.

"What are we doing today?" he asked. "Janelle Monae's backup dancers are coming to learn the first dance for the first song on the album... Oh. we have a break next week, she has another choreography company for the next two songs" i tell him while checking my calendar.

Matt is my business partner and roommate. Him and I are the proud owners of a dance company called Duo Dance. We started DD co, 3 years ago so it is still fairly new.

"I have a modeling gig to do next week so you'll have the apartment for two days" I say, scanning my calendar for the next few weeks. "Why and where?" he inquired, looking over my shoulder and the big calendar that has both our schedules. "Because the first day is for the fitting and the second day they want me to model some clothes of my choosing.. It's in Palm Springs" I explain. "Nice" he said simply.  

Apart for Duo Dance, I'm a very successful model. I have been since the age of 10, when I made a friend whose dad was a famous photographer. Benjamin.

He told me that my 'doe eyes' would make it big in the modeling scene and begged me to start. I eventually relented to his pleading after a couple weeks and we did my first ever shoot. It was horrible but he believed in me and boosted my confidence which pushed me to be as successful as I am now.

During those years he became a parent figure to me as my real dad had died before I was born and my mother was a heavy drug addict who didn't really take care of me. But sadly when I was 17, he passed away due to an unknown illness.

It rocked my world and put my career on halt. I stopped doing anything and just stayed in my bed for months. I was so sad and angry. I couldn't understand why I was being punished with bad parent luck.

After a long year and painful, I realized that he would have wanted me to continue modeling so that's what I did. I started picking up the pieces of my broken life- which was at the age of 18.

I moved away from Milwaukee to Los Angeles as I just couldn't bear being in Milwaukee anymore knowing that my "father" was dead in a cemetery four blocks from me or that my mother was digging herself to her own death everyday.

When I got to LA everything was perfect. Until it wasn't. I had this nagging feeling that there was something missing in my life. Any other person would have felt so fulfilled- I was 'rich and famous' as the magazines liked to say- but my heart wasn't full yet.

One day I found out what the missing thing was.

I loved modeling so much but from a young age my wish was to be a dancer. I wanted to entertain people, make them laugh and cry and I just couldn't be completely happy with only being a model. So I took a dance class, which I hadn't done in years, to solidify my feelings.

The last time I had done a dance class was when I was 16 so it was difficult but refreshing going back into it. When the season was over, I felt the happiest I had felt since my dad had died. So I made the decision to go to college and become a professional choreographer.

I originally started doing dance at 12, when my modeling pay checks started to come in more consistently. I had always loved dance. My mom said I used to dance around the house all the time when I was 4 all the time. But entering a dance class at 12 was only supposed to be a way for me to make friends.