Back To You // Peter Hayes

phobophobia

the fear of fear itself

I left my bed extra early the next morning and made my way to the rooftop to meet Tobias, he'd told me Erudite were scheduled in to make another delivery this morning and he wanted to get a better idea of what was going on.

I made it up there early and went over to the railing, crouching by the edge to hide. The loading bay looked the same as last time - about half a dozen dauntless soldiers moving cargo crates into the compound off erudite trucks. The clanging of metal behind me meant that Tobias was finally here. He climbed out of the hatch but he had someone with him - Tris.

"Baby, what are you doing here?" she asked me as they approached,

"Oh, um," I looked over at Tobias, I wasn't sure if he wanted me to tell her,

"Bonnie's my sister, she's been helping me out figure out this stuff." he cut in.

Tris's eyes switched between the two of us as if a realisation had just hit her, "That makes a lot of sense actually."

I didn't bother questioning why she was here, but I'm sure it has something to do with the fact that Tris hasn't been back in our room for the past two nights and she's wearing Tobias's sweater. It was pretty obvious what was going on between them - I'd called it from the first week which means Christina totally owes me ten bucks.

When Tobias had explained to Tris what Erudite was doing, he sent us back downstairs with a 'strong advisory' so go and rest before our final tests later. Trust Toby to tell us to relax after telling us both about a secret plot between the two strongest factions, that could potentially destroy chicago.

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"Relax, you're a natural, you've got this." Will reassured me, all of the initiates were sat in a waiting room before our tests, you could practically see the stress steaming off of people.

"Will Hughes." a woman dressed fully in navy blue opened the door  as she called out his name.

He shakily stood up, "I'll see you on the other side." he messed up my hair with his hand, he laughed and walked into the testing room.

Tris and Christina had already gone through for their tests so I was left on my own. I looked around the room and caught sight of Peter, who was already looking over at me, and for the first time ever, I smiled at him.

Things between us almost felt strange - like I hadn't spent the past six months loathing his entire existence. But it felt natural being around him, like I should've been this whole time and I forgot why I ever hated him. I'm hesitant, of course, I still don't trust him - why would I? But something told me that this was right, that he was right, and I'm not sure I'll ever understand it but I guess I should trust my gut more often.

"Baby." the woman called out my name, making me realise I'd forgotten to ever tell them my last name. Honestly, I wasn't sure which one I'd rather pick.

"Come find me after." Peter said as I walked past and he hooked his pinky finger onto mine, I guess that's become a 'thing' now.

I smiled and nodded, unhooking my finger from his and walking off into the testing room.

The room was abnormally big considering what it was used for, the ceilings stretched up at least three stories. There were big screens around the edges of the room, and in the centre was the chair used for the simulations. The woman administrating the serum, Tori (i think her name was), helped me into the chair and placed two tabs on either side of my forehead, "Good luck, Kid." she said as she injected the serum into my neck.

When I reopened my eyes, I found myself on a small wooden raft, with the ocean wrapped around me. The water was a deep, dark blue- almost black and I couldn't see anything through it, it stretched for as far as I could see - apart from a small island in the distance. Fear of water - that one suprised me honestly - one bad experience in a pool when I was five and suddenly it's one of my biggest fears?