I'll love you, until the end.

Five: I Know

That night, a few people were going to hang out in the common rooms. Pansy, Blaise, Lorenzo, Draco and myself. I got dressed in my white joggers, gray tank top and a pair of white fluffy socks. I let my long blonde hair down and washed my face clean, just to be comfortable while we all sat around chatting. Pansy and I headed out and the boys were already there, Blaise sitting on one couch with his legs crossed, Lorenzo on the floor leaning against the other couch in front of Blaise and Draco sitting on the couch Lorenzo was leaning against with his legs stretched out. Pansy sat next to Blaise and I sat next to Pansy. The boys were all laughing about something and Lorenzo was passing a bottle of fire whiskey to Pansy. She took a large swig and handed it to me, I followed suit, feeling it burn the whole way down.
"What are you guys talking about?" Pansy asked.
"Girls." Blaise smirked.
"Of course." Pansy rolled her eyes.
"We were talking about the first time we.. you know." Lorenzo smiled.
"Fucked." Draco flatly added.
"Pig." Pansy scoffed.
"When did you lose it, Pansy? If you can remember. Must be hard since you get around a lot." Draco smirked.
"I actually didn't lose mine until last year." She stuck her tongue out at Draco.
"Don't tell me Malfoy was your first!" Blaise spat out.
"No! It was a Ravenclaw boy. Over break. Before Draco and I-" she trailed off.
"What about you Clov?" Lorenzo asked softly.
"She hasn't." Pansy giggled.
Draco slowly sat up. My eyes watched as his face went pale and his eyes slowly met mine. His jaw locked and his eyes grew large.
"Uh- yeah. I just haven't had time, being from a mostly female school doesn't help either." I tried to explain, ripping my eyes away from Draco, but I could feel him burning a hole through me.
"You never messed with any girls?" Blaise laughed.
"No! I'm strictly boys. I just took my studies very seriously." I laughed.
"Don't worry, we will fix that. Maybe after the Yule ball. Maybe if you accept someone's invite.." Pansy began to tease.
I looked over at Lorenzo who was already watching me and right above him Draco was still glaring.
"Shut up Pansy." I said quietly.
Lorenzo softly smiled and looked down at his lap. I looked back to Draco who was now sitting straight up, his eyes STILL glued to me. Why did he care so much. He was obviously disturbed to learn he was my first but it's not like we have to get married. I was going to lose it one way or another, Draco just sped that along. I looked away, feeling my cheeks turn red.
"I'm gonna go use the rest room." I blurted.
They all nodded and went back to chatting. I could feel Draco's eyes watch me as I left, sending electricity through my body. I slowly made my way down the hall,  stopping to lean against a wall. I just needed some air, a break from feeling so out of place. The cold stone against my shoulders was welcoming and I took a deep breath.
"Why didn't you tell me?" A voice grumbled from down the hall.
I jumped and stood straight up, squinting my eyes to make out who was there. Draco emerged from the shadows, anger all over his face.
"I- I just-" I stuttered. "Why does it matter?"
"Because, now you'll feel some kind of attachment for me. I NEVER take a girls virginity. I don't need that shit in my life." He spat.
I began to shake. Not from fear or the cold but anxiety. It filled me like the air in my lungs. He stepped closer to me, a few inches away. We stared at each other for a moment and it was like you could feel the air between us.
"I'm- so, you're taking Pansy to the ball?" I quietly asked.
"Ugh. See there it is. You want me to take you instead? Already attached new girl?"
"No! No. I just was confused as to why you're sleeping with me if you're dating Pansy again." I said.
"I'm not dating Pansy." He sighed, stepping an inch closer. "My mother is making me take her. Our families are in business together."
He was standing even closer to me now and I could smell mint and whiskey on him. I opened my mouth to talk but there was no air in my lungs. There was nothing but the smell of him. All I could do was watch. I watched as he got even closer, leaning over me, watching me too. I wondered if I looked pathetic to him, a shaking mess.
"Draco." I whispered.
"Stop doing that." He breathed, closing his eyes.
"Doing what?" I asked.
"Saying my name." He opened his eyes, staring at me.
He leaned his face closer to mine, our eyes level and our lips a twitch apart. I wanted to say something, but the only thing I managed to get out was..
"Draco."
He slammed his lips into mine, pushing me up against the wall. My hands tangled themselves into his hair and his hands wrapped around my waist, our bodies molding so naturally together.
"Fuck!" He screamed, pushing himself off of me.
I was standing there, lips swollen and breathless.
"What-" I whispered.
"I can't fucking do this. We're nothing. I don't even know you! I can't- fuck!" He began to pace, running his hand through his hair.
"Draco?" I was so confused.
"Fucking stop!" He barked.
"Why? What are you talking about?" I raised my voice.
"You- the way you say my name drives me insane! Every time I see you, smell you, hear your voice, I want you. I want to taste you, feel you, hear you scream my name." He stopped pacing and stood in front of me with desperation all over his face.
I didn't know what to say. I stood there, taking in everything he just said.
"I know." I breathed.
His face turned to shock.
"What?" He said quietly.
"I know." I said again.
He rushed forward, crashing into me and the kiss he gave me was, deep, longing. I wrapped my arms around him and he did the same. We pressed into each other as much as possible, like we were trying to become one. All at once we began ripping at each others clothes. He ripped my shirt off of me and I ripped his belt off. His pants fell, clanging to the floor with his belt. He slid my pants down and suddenly he slammed himself inside of me, wrapping my leg around his waist and burying his face into my neck. I let out a gasp and grabbed the back of his neck with one hand and his shoulder with the other.
"Fuck." He breathed into my neck.
"Draco." I gasped.
With that, he began pumping faster, breathing harder onto my skin. As quickly as it started, it ended, with both of us letting out a grunt and then leaning against each other.
"Why are you doing this to me?" He whined quietly.
"I could ask you the same." I smiled to myself.
He pulled himself away from me and began quickly and quietly getting dressed. He took out his wand and waved it in my direction.
"Reparo." He muttered, and I watched as my shirt quickly sewed itself back together.
I bent over and slowly pulled my own pants back up and ran my fingers through my hair, my eyes glued to Draco. He turned away from me and began walking down the hall towards the common room.
"Where are you going?" I asked.
He shook his head and kept walking.
"DRACO!" I shouted after him. "DRACO!" My voice cracked and Draco finally stopped in his tracks.
He slowly turned and glared at me, but didn't move, so I quickly walked closer to him.
"What- are we?" I asked. "Are we.. dating?"
"Pfft. I don't have time for you." He growled.
"Oh? But you have time to fuck me?" I snapped.
"Now you're catching on." He smirked.
"Then what about what you just said?" I whimpered.
"I lied. I'm drunk." He said flatly, sliding his hands into his pockets.
"I don't believe you." I whispered.
He shrugged his shoulders.
"Believe what you want new girl."
"Draco." I breathed. "I know you feel something, anything for me."
His face scrunched into a frown and his cheeks turned red as he stepped right in front of me.
"Let's get a few things clear. One, no one is to know I was your first, two, don't speak of any of this to anyone." He snarled.
"And three?"
"And three... you dare fucking go with Lorenzo to the ball, I will crucio him." He growled before spinning on his heels and walking back to the common room.
I smiled to myself.
So you do feel things Draco Malfoy.