What would it take? - A Kissing Booth Fan Fiction

Thirty-three

Elle

If I could sum up this whole ordeal in a single word, it would be exhausting. I never knew that talking could be so tiring, but that feels like all I've done since I got out of the hospital, talk, talk and more talk. Even all the sleeping I've done in between the talking hasn't stopped me feeling like a wrung-out mop. Actually, that's a pretty good analogy for how I feel, really. Every last tear has been twisted out of me during all those tough conversations.

After Lee and I talked some more, he tried to call Noah, but his mom picked up instead. Apparently Noah was passed out asleep on the lounge and nobody had the heart to wake him. I spent a lot of time thinking about what Lee said that afternoon, about how Noah was taking it hard. I mean, I guess I already knew that deep down, but he's always so strong, so steady, it's hard to think of him needing anything, or anyone.

Maybe that's just the story I tell myself though, because I, more than anyone else in the world, know that Noah feels things deeply, even though he pretends he doesn't. June and I talked on the phone for a little bit, and I caught the note of worry in her voice when she talked about him.

"Elle, sweetie, I know you've been through a hell of a lot in the last 48 hours, but can you do me a favor?"

"Of course, what is it?"

"Just..." she hesitated, maybe trying to find the right way to frame her request.

She really needn't have bothered, though. Mrs Flynn gave so much and asked for so little, that it didn't matter what she asked of me, I would try my best to do it.

"When you and Noah talk next, can you ask him how he feels? Really ask him and don't let him skip out on answering, okay?"

I felt my lip wobble as I thought about what must've happened for her to be this concerned about his state of mind, and my voice came out small and scratchy when I replied.

"Yes." I cleared my throat. "I promise, I will."

"Thanks, honey."

My mind was going a hundred miles a minute and I couldn't stop myself asking the burning question.

"Did he... did he say something?"

"He said he was really scared for you, Elle. You being hurt is kind of his worst nightmare, you know? It's not a fair comparison, I realize, but remember his last football game, when he got that bad tackle and didn't get up right away? That moment, when none of us knew how hurt he was and how instantly afraid you were for him?"

"Yeah," I whispered, thinking how it felt like my heart stopped beating and I couldn't breathe until he started moving again.

"Well, multiply those few seconds by the whole time it took to get you to the hospital and for the doctors to check you over. I think that's probably pretty close to how Noah was feeling."

"Oh," I breathed, my hand coming up to cover my mouth. "Oh, my God."

"Elle. Elle, honey, I didn't say that to scare you, okay? I just want you to know that he's in this with you, he's hurting too. And you both... I know, it's such a lot to deal with, too much really, for the two of you. But you'll be better off dealing with it together. You two are the only ones who really, truly know what you're going through, and you need to talk to each other, and just... be kind to one another, will you?"

I nodded then, before realizing that she couldn't see me and managed to squeak out a response.

"I will, I promise."

"Good."

A thought I'd had earlier snapped back to the front of my mind, reshaped by the conversation we just had.