Hidden Secrets

30- Impulse

Sofiia- "You're my idol"

"Don't get ahead of yourself, I haven't won yet"

Lucas- "Yeah but you totally will, you've been playing so good"

"Don't jinx it!" I scold the two as I quickly knock on the wood dresser beside me

After picking out my outfit I check my phone

Max🦁
-How about this, I win the grand prix, you win the tournament, deal?

Blondie🦁
-Everyone is going to jinx it! You can't say that yet

It scares me slightly, how everyone is set on me winning, not even thinking on the idea of a loss, telling me that I have to win, there's no excuse

Ale🚩
Just got out of training with the excuse that I have to watch your match so thanks bae for subconsciously saving me from my trainer ;)

Lena🚩
- Ill even write a note saying that you're allowed and you're not lying

Ale🚩
Make sure your signature is on there so they don't think I wrote it! Should I give it to the front office or my teacher?

Lena🚩
-Definitely the front office

Sofiia- "Alright Princess, time to go win this tournament for the second year in a row"

I check my other notifications, hoping for a certain one to show up but it never does, it hasn't since the 30th, and even then, I was the one that texted him first, telling him that he had done amazing for winning the Azerbaijan grand prix

I should be angry with him, for his little comments and random actions, as if keeping me at a far enough distance so that he can still date Carly, but keeping me close enough that he knows i'm still there, that I haven't ran off, unable to leave him and my feelings for him behind, instead, they're on a leash, never able to get far enough away, always within sight.

I should be angry with him, and yet i'm more angry with myself.

I shake off my thoughts, desperate to alleviate myself from my continuous overthinking, I have a tournament to win.

Over two hours into the match, 6-4, 6-5

Im up, 40-30, my serve

Breathe, I bounce the ball three times

my pulse is in my head, pounding against me, running through my whole body, my minds a blur, blacking out with the pressure of the point

I toss the ball

My feet feel as if prepared to give out

My arm flies up

In.

My entire body is begging to stop, telling me i'm overworking myself

Forehand approach.

I'm so close to loosing it, my elbow wants to collapse

Volley.

I can't see, I feel like i'll throw up

Overhead.

"Match, Petrovic"

I stop, taking a second before truly understanding what I did

Two years in a row! I've won this tournament twice in a row!

Holy shit!

__

Lucas, Sofiia, and I are sitting in Lucas' hotel room, yesterday I won a whole ass fucking tournament and it's 9:30 at night on a sunday but instead of celebrating, i'm forcing the two of them to watch the Formula 1 race