Lioness in training

Late night chats

Ellis's pov:

I couldn't go to sleep, I mean I hadn't tried and I wasn't overly anxious about anything it was just a lot to think about. A lot to process from the day, I just needed some time to think through everything. It's like analysing your opponents in football analysed the day which probably wasn't the best thing as it often meant was overly critical of myself. But it was my time where I could just properly think to myself, it brought me some peace, if only a little.

I was just sat in the chill room I wasn't sure how long it had been since everyone else went upstairs, at this rate I was probably going to fall asleep there. I was just so into my head, I was lost in my own world my own cinematic screening of what happened over the day. It was so vivid it felt like it was real, this was my issue I would go so deep in my head it was like I was living in an alternate reality, I would forget what was going on around me.

Leah's pov:

I went up to bed with the others but I just couldn't fall asleep and kept tossing and turning, G (Georgia) was not impressed and kept shouting at me to shut up as I was keeping her awake. I felt bad so I decided to go for a walk as I just couldn't shake the feeling that something was up.

I was just walking about, it was weird all the lights were off and the halls were completely empty compared to usually where there is someone running about. Despite us all being adults, apart from Ellis most of us were very immature and pranks seemed to be a daily thing. I decided to head into the chill room maybe play a game of fifa, I needed the practice as I was sick of Lucy constantly beating me then rubbing it my face. I was shocked when I walked in a saw Ellis curled up in a bean bag just staring at the wall.

She looked as if she was very deep in thought, I didn't want to interrupt her so I went to turn around and tripped on the remote that was left on the floor. This made quite a bit of noise, which clearly startled her as she basically jumped out of her skin and turned to look at me with panicked eyes.

Leah: ''Hi Ellis I'm sorry I didn't mean to disturb you, are you alright''

Ellis: ''Yeah I'm fine I was just thinking what are you doing up?''

Leah: ''I could ask you the same thing, I just couldn't sleep, you?''

Ellis: ''Uhm yeah same, well I guess I never really tried to be honest''

Leah: ''Wait seriously you do realise its like 1 in the morning, you know we have training tomorrow''

Ellis: ''I guess I just lost track of time, I'm sorry''

Leah: ''Why are you apologising, I was just wondering, you can talk to me you know. I mean I know we just met but like the others said we are a team now, we are here for each other.''

Ellis: ''Ye-yeah I'm fine I was just thinking about today''

Leah: ''What the fact that I beat you in the volleyball''

Ellis: ''No''

She said with a small smile

Ellis: ''Just generally, I just like to go over the day in my head''

Leah: ''Why, I mean you can't change was has happened''

Ellis: ''I know I just I-I, I can't really explain it''

Leah: ''What is going on in that head of yours''

Third person pov:

It was weird Ellis was always a closed book she never really told people things, she didn't want them to know about all her little gimmicks as it made her seem weaker. But there was something about Leah which made her want to open up. She was conflicted does she open up or just brush it of and keep it bottled up. Knowing that eventually it will get to her and she will snap, I mean the cracks were already starting to show it was getting to much for her to handle.

So she made the decision she never thought she would she was going to talk.

Ellis: ''I d-d-don't know its hard to explain''

Leah: ''You don't have to, I'm not pressuring you into anything I just want to help and it looks like there is so much going on up there''

Ellis ''No No its fine I want to its just hard I have never really told anyone before, it will take a while and I mean I understand if you don't want to stay, I j-ju-just, I don't know''

Leah: ''No rush we have all night, well until 8 when we have to be up for breakfast but I'm sure 7 hours will be alright''

You could see a small brief smile pass over Ellis's face at the small joke she seemed to be getting more comfortable, maybe this would help her share. She took a deep breath and started spilling everything, from her parents death to her emotionless aunt. It was like a tap that you couldn't turn of. Then she got to her anxiety this is where it got harder as she found it hard to put it into words.

Ellis: ''It was a few years ago I started getting them, I mean the panic attacks, they became more regular and I could never control them, it felt like my mind was on its own train track and I was on another. I mean I have always had anxiety I tend to overthink most things I just get into my head about everything I dont know how to stop it.''

Leah just sat there listening taking it all in, her heart breaking as she heard all that the girl had gone through, just wanting to there be for her. Instead of talking after Ellis finished, Leah could see the tears rolling from her eyes. Leah pulled Ellis into her lap. This said more than words in Ellis's eyes this is what it looked like when someone cared, and that was enough for her.

They stayed like this with them both eventually falling asleep, both feeling a little bit happier than before, but still a lot to be worked through.

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