Stressmonster was a stressed monster. It would have been funny if it weren't for the everything.
To say that Stress had had a bit of a bad day would be a bit of an understatement. She'd been trying to get some work done on her rail station – the idea of a train crashed through the ice had looked so good in her mind's eye. Unfortunately, she'd been beset from all side by creepers, hypothermia, a random floating cookie in the sky, and her worst enemy – builder's block.
She sighed, sitting down on the ice. Even now, the urge to just start biting people was overwhelming. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. She'd kept such a good lid on her lycanthropy during the civil war, so why, all of a sudden, did it feel like she was constantly on the edge of exploding and tearing someone apart?
"Hello, Stress!" Doc called from on top of the giant cookie. "I see you down there!"
Right. There was also all that. She shook her head to herself and stood up. Best to get this over with.
"Hello," she greeted, as the two detective assistants flew down. Doc – sorry, Docson – landed next to her, Renson following close behind. "I was wondering what this great thing in my sky was, to be honest."
"Don't play innocent, wondering what it is!" Docson argued. "You know exactly what it is!"
Oh, so this was going to be that kind of interrogation. Great. Stress bit back the urge to growl.
"Methinks she doth protest too much, Docson!" Renson chimed in.
"What are you both wearing?" Stress accused, giving herself some time to recenter, and not bite her friends' heads off over some silly server game. To be fair, their outfits were kind of ridiculous. She had absolutely no idea how in the overworld Doc was managing to balance that monocle on his mechanical eye.
"Um, Stressmonster," Renson replied, indignant. "That's Renson."
"Renson?" She asked.
"Doctor Renson. PhD."
"Doctor Docson, please," Doctor Docson chimed in. Stress refused to call him that in her internal monologue, actually. She'd be sticking to Renson and Docson.
"So, uh, this giant cookie over here," Ren nodded to the thing in the sky.
"Yeah?" Stress asked.
"We're pretty sure this is you, for a number of reasons." As Renson spoke, Stress' eyelid twitched. The sun was setting, and that made fighting off her transformation even harder. "To get you up to speed, someone stole our diamonds during the war, then we found them in a chest labelled Jangled, then we found some cookies," Renson counted off his points on his fingers. "Cookie Monster? Stress Monster? That's... my deduction."
"There was a poem," Docson added, nodding along as if this made sense. "Don't worry, it's cool, the diamonds are back, we're good. Just confess, and we're cool."
"Confess!" Renson yelled, his hackles raised. Stress subconsciously responded in kind. "Confess!"
"This is, you know, a little bit scary, I'm not gonna lie," She put her hands up placatingly, although she wasn't certain whether that placation was meant for herself or for Renson and Docson.
"Confess, and you shall be allowed all the cookies that thou wish!"
"Listen," Stress snapped, cutting Renson off. "Listen. If I was this... this Jangler-Cookie-Monster-Stress-Thing, why would I build the cookie so close to my base?"
"Um," Renson replied, his energy completely gone.
"Why would I do that?" Stress asked, the question actually coming out as a growl this time. Her hair was probably turning pink about now. "You think I'm stupid?" What was meant to be a light-hearted punch to Renson's shoulder turned into a heavy, clawed shove. He yelped, falling off the track.
"Docson," Renson stuttered, clambering back up, "I had not considered that possibility."
"Didn't you get enough, by mercilessly killing us during the war?" Docson asked. He looked rattled. The wolf in Stress smiled. Good. "You want to embarrass us even more?"
Renson made it back up to the rail. Doc was still talking on, trying to get her to confess out of pity. She was done with this now, actually.
She growled, finally letting the transformation run loose. Renson and Docson took a step back as pink fur overtook skin, her ears back and her teeth bared. She lunged for Renson, easily taking a bite out of his shoulder as he staggered back with a cry.
"Docson!" Renson yelled, as Docson flew to safety. "Docson, I've been murdered-!" The end of his word was cut off as Stress took another bite, sending him off to a respawn. Docson hurried away, terrified. Good. The wolf padded back to the side her bed, and curled up to ease off the rest of the tension that had brought it out, closing her eyes to settle into a comfortable sleep, dreaming of chasing rabbits.
---
I really miss writing s6 tbh.
I've been Entropy, peace out from the present!
