Dive

Chapter Eighteen

 "There are two kinds of taste, the taste for emotions of surprise and the taste for emotions of recognition." – Henry James

The next morning, I wake up with a headache. I sit up in the unfamiliar bed and rub my fingers against my temples, wishing this day had started a little better. As I get out of bed and drag my feet into the adjoining bathroom, I take a few deep breaths and will my body to cooperate.

It's a little past nine when I make my way to the kitchen. Everyone is already downstairs, having coffee and chatting about today's party. Amanda spots me as soon as I walk through the open door and she shoots to her feet immediately, coming to hug me.

"Happy birthday, babe!" she says into my hair, squeezing me tightly.

I smile and return the hug. "Thanks, Ames."

She pulls back with a wide grin. "Are you ready for today?"

I chuckle. "Not really."

She rolls her eyes at me. "We're going to have a lot of fun; I promise."

Before I can reply, Ella and Jamie came to wish me a happy birthday. When they are done, the only person in the room who hasn't approached me yet is Knox. For a moment, I think he's not going to say anything, but then he finally sets his cup of coffee on the island and stands.

My spine stiffens when he walks toward me and stops mere inches away. He seems to hesitate for a second before he leans down and gives me a brief, one-arm hug.

"Happy birthday, Carina." His voice is a smooth baritone that makes my knees weak, and his proximity is intoxicating.

My head is pounding by the time he pulls back, and I don't know if it's from having him touch me again or something else. Eyes unfocused, I glance away and say a quiet "thanks".

"Do you like your dress?" Amanda asks, still oblivious to the tension between us. "I hope it fits well."

I turn my attention to her, barely able to concentrate on her words. "Uh... it does, and I love it. Thank you."

"You seem a bit distracted. Is it the party? I promise I have everything under control. Catering is arriving in an hour and the guests should be here by four."

"Sounds good," I say and attempt another smile. I don't really care about the guests right now. The only person I seem to care about is standing beside her, hands tucked into his pockets and eyes on anything but me.

Until a minute ago, he hasn't addressed a word to me since we arrived here yesterday. When I returned to the table after my call with Julian, he was already gone, and I didn't see him again until later that day. He spent most of the evening with Jamie while me and the girls indulged in gossiping and a few more cocktails beside the pool.

"How many people are coming?" Jamie asks, and Amanda manages to look sheepish.

"About thirty."

This snaps me out of my reverie. "Thirty? Ames, we agreed to no more than fifteen. I don't even know anyone beside you guys."

"I'm sorry," she says, though she doesn't sound sorry at all. "I really tried to keep the list short, but then I started thinking that I should also invite this person, and then that person, and I ended up with thirty."

Jamie chuckles. "Thirty including those present here?"

"No," she responds quietly, and I suddenly want to strangle her. I know she means well, but I never wanted a party in the first place. Being surrounded by so many people I've never met is not how I envisioned this day. I would have rather spent it at home, having a pleasant dinner with just her, a good movie and a bottle of wine.