Twenty

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The world spins around me at a pace I do not like, I want it to slow

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The world spins around me at a pace I do not like, I want it to slow.

Everything needs to calm down and stop spinning so fast, my head can't keep up and I'm growing dizzier with every passing second.

The colours. The lights. They blur into a singular stream, overwhelming my eyes and making them burn. It feels like they're being held open, I can't shut my eyes. My body aches but I feel disconnected, like nothing is attached to my mind except my brain that's going so fast like the world around me.

I try to scream for help, feeling my body vibrate with the force of my shout deep in my chest but no sound leaves me, my jaw hangs down and once it's there I can't get it back up.

I'm stuck in one place while the word flashed around me tauntingly.

I want to cry for someone to rescue me. I want Niall.

But he's not here and I don't know if he's coming to save me.

"Niamh."

No... no please go away.

The sound of his taunting voice makes me want to crawl up in a ball, my head turning in the hopes of finding him before he finds me.

"Come out, come out wherever you are..."

I don't want to play. I don't want to play. I don't want to play.

I manage to move my hands and slap them over my ears, finally squeezing my eyes tightly shut as I try to escape the horrors around me. I'm trying to pretend he's not here trying to scare me, we're playing hide and seek.

Except I don't want him to find me.

"Niamh... Niamh...." His voice sings for me, trying to lure me into his soft sounding tone but he'll turn at the snap of his fingers when I let my guard down. "You know I'll find you eventually."

He's meant to be dead, not here, not now.

Please leave me alone.

When silence follows I make the mistake of opening my eyes, seeing his face inches from mine and I finally let out a rippling scream. He's not him, he's not my father - he's a paler and beginning to decompose, version of himself.

My lip trembles.

He found me.

I must be dead.

"Let me go back." I plead through tears, getting no reply so I shout. "Let me go back!"

He reaches for me with a cold hand, his skin almost grey and clinging tight to his small bones. I shudder at the feeling of his skin on mine, releasing a sob in plea for help but I'm stuck with him now and there's no going back.

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