I Hate You, Lover (ON HOLD)

Chapter 9 "Dream Girl"

I just arrived home, trying to find my house keys in my bag. Nahatid ko na kanina sina Vier at Tanya sa mga bahay nila.

I finally got in the house and went straight upstairs to my room and tossed myself in the bed. Hindi ko na alam kung saan napunta ang bag at sapatos ko dahil initsa ko nalang kung saan nang marating ko ang kwarto ko.

My brother and I have been living on our own since we turned 18. We don't really have a good relationship with our Dad ever since our mother died, He started to mistreat me because he said I remind him too much of our late mother, while he favored my brother more.

Mabuti nalang at meron ang Tito namin, ang Papa ni Vier. His Papa has been a single father ever since Vier's mom died of cancer when we were kids, we don't really remember much of her but Vier's Papa said she was Nice like our late Mom.

Ever since he found out what his brother- our Dad was doing he got mad and took us away for a while. Then we felt that he was more of a father to us than our real Dad. That's when we started calling him Papa, which he was, he made us feel like we have a family again.

Zathrian didn't like that our Dad was being unfair to me that's why he got mad at him. He got mad at him for the both of us, cause even though he mistreats me I still can't bring myself to hate him, para sakin siya parin ang Dad ko at mahal ko parin siya.

Kahit magalit pa siya dahil second best lang ako sa school hindi ko parin kayang magalit sakaniya, kahit sabihan niya pa ako ng masasakit na salita na sana ako nalang ang namatay at hindi si Mom, tatanggapin ko yun because to me he's still my dad.

"You're a disgrace to this family! Why can't you be THE best huh?! look at this you're only the second best in your class!"

"I-i'm s-sorry po Dad ill do better I swear!" I cried out.

"Go to my office!" He demanded.

"No Dad please don't, punish me instead." My Brother pleaded covering me with his body.

"Get out of the way Zathrian, your sister needs to learn."

"I can take it kuya, it's okay." I looked at him and tried my best to smile.

But that all changed when not even a month after our Mom died he started bringing women over. Zathrian and I couldn't believe that he could just forget about his wife and start having multiple women over. The first time it happened I couldn't handle the pain that I was feeling so I sneaked out of our house and rode my bike to the cemetery where my Mom was buried, Muntik panga ako masagasaan nun dahil sa bilis ng pagpapatakbo ko.

Nang makarating ako sa puntod niya ay ikwuinento ko sakaniya lahat ng nangyare nang mawala siya, wala along pakealam kung gabihin ako dun o multuhin bastat maramdaman ko lang na parang meron pa siya ay masaya na ako.

Nag dumilim na ay di ko namalayan na nakatulog na pala ako kakaiyak nagising lang ako nang may maramdaman kong may bumubuhat sakin, akala ko pa nga isasama na ako ng mga multo sa kabilang buhay eh. Turns out it was my brother Zathrian,

"Zathy?" I asked with a sleepy voice.

"Kuya's here Vlancy, you can sleep." He said while carrying me in his back.

I didn't know how he found out I was there but I'm glad he found me. I'm thankful that he's my twin.

My thoughts were interrupted when I hear the doorbell ring.

I walked downstairs. I knew who It is before I opened the door.

"Why are you still in your uniform?" I asked him.

"Dumeretso agad ako dito eh." Sabi ng kakambal ko.

"Zathrian halos magkatabi lang tayo ng bahay, you're literally 3 houses away."

"Ishhh, are you not gonna let me in?" He whined like a child, even rolling his eyes at me.

Nang makapasok siya ay pumunta kami sa living room area at umupo sa couch.

"So, sasabihin mo ba sakin why you're nowhere to be found this morning?" I asked.

He sighed taking one of the pillows and putting it on his face.

"Remember that girl I was dancing with last night?"

"Which one?"

"Whatever how would you even remember, all you did that night was rant about your ex."

"Lah hindi ah, but enough about me, which girl are u talking about anyways?"

"Basta! The one I went out with last night." He exclaimed.

"When you say 'went out with' you mean yung pinunta mo sa 7/11?" I raised my eyebrow at him.

He nodded.

"What about her?" I asked.

"One thing led to another and you know...." Sabi niya habang pahina ng pahina ang boses.

"HAHAHA, So? What's the big deal, you slept with other people before- wait did you not use protection?!"

"What?! Of course, I did I'm not irresponsible like that."

"Good, baka magtampo si Papa di mo kwinekwento sakanya, So what happened next?."

"We went to my house right? Then pagkagising ko she's gone and all she fucking left was a sorry note!" He said frustrated.

I couldn't help but laugh.

"Oh my God si Zathrian Axrielle Morelle nabiktima ng fuck and run? HAHAHA!"

"It's not funny Cy, masakit kayaaa." He whined like a kid.

"Ok ok I'm sorry, what happened next then?"

"I saw her again this morning."

"Where?"

"Sa school, more specifically sa cafeteria."

I put two and two together and-

"STOP! Is that why you were so moody kanina you barely even talked."

"Yeah." He said scratching his nape.

"Who is it did you get her name?"

"I didn't, but I found out in the cafeteria when we were with her."

"Wait, do I know her?"

"Yes, Rhaine was it?"

"Shut the fuck up!"

He just nodded in response.

"Hala ka Zathrian that's such a big coincidence!"

"I know, makikita ko na siya sa school damn it. And I don't think I'm ready to confront her"

"You have to eventually."

"I do... Can we please not talk about that anymore I need to clear my head.

"Okay." I patted his back.

We talked for a while about personal things and what we wanted to do in the future when my dreams came up.

"So are you still dreaming about that girl?" My brother brought up.

"Yeah I still can't get her out of my head, but I can feel that I'm close to seeing her face."

"How do you say?" Tanong ng kapatid ko.

"Feeling ko lang malapit ko nang mabuo ang muka niya sa isip ko, all I need to do is keep painting her to remember that face."

I've been having dreams of this woman for a long time now. Hindi ko siya kilala pero lagi ko siyang nakikita sa panaginip, but when I wake up I can't seem to remember her face.

That's why every chance I get I paint her so that I can remember what she looks like but in almost all paintings of her she has a blurred face. Kung hindi nakikita ang muka ay naka blurred ito. A mixture of paint that covers her unknown features.

One day I'll remember you but for now, I'll just paint you until I see your face again and finish your portrait.