I Am Not In Love [Zarry Stylik AU]©️

I don't like dinners and sweet desserts

H,

Friday

Not this one.

That other one doesn't work either.

This colour combination is just stupid.

I thought I had gotten rid of this shirt.

Too warm.

Not warm enough.

Too sheer.

How did I get this stain here?

My room looked like a clothing store had exploded, leaving items all over. Jeans on my bed, shirts on the floor, shoes scattered about and me standing in front of the mirror trying something on for the millionth time.

Should I wear a blazer and matching pants or jeans and a shirt? Boots or sneakers?

It was an Italian restaurant, our last 'hang out' and I needed to look good. The restaurant itself was expensive, had tasty food and with high ratings.

Me: I'm not complaining, but that is an expensive restaurant.

Zayn: I thought you said you wanted to be impressed.

And I was.

So, I needed to be dressed accordingly.

No, this wasn't going to work.

Nor was this.

These pants don't fit anymore, and this shirt is missing a bloody button.

I twisted and turned my closet after a day's work - I even finished earlier, leaving Maria in charge, so I could prepare.

Yes, I was nervous. I was itching and jumping. This had to be perfect.

Why? Because Zayn deserved it and if we played our cards correctly, something could come out of this.

Not just sex. Something-something.

I know Zayn was hurt in the past, probably still battling insecurity, fear, and trust issues, but I wanted to show him that he could trust me. He had shown me that he could. After all, Zayn got into a car with me at 04h00am in the morning, to go off to the coast and ride a motorcycle for the first time. He had shown me his songs, I had heard his voice - something he said, he hadn't shown anyone else. That was trust, right?

I had a glimpse of who he was as a person, and I couldn't wait to peel more.

For the day, I had a smile on my face, and I had it still. I couldn't stop thinking about the kiss and my almost moment with Zayn. Thank God for self-control or we would be acting recklessly. I had butterflies, bees, birds, and every winged creature flapping about from my stomach to my chest, whenever I thought about it. It had been so intense and so decadent. I couldn't forget the look on his face when he saw me arriving on my motorbike or how the sun touched his skin.

And the almost.

That entire moment of feeling against him. Loving his size, his breath on me. I was melting all the way home. When he kissed me goodbye, Zayn killed me. Shot! Right in my heart.

Even at the shop I had made sure to share my love with all. I noticed a batch of roses that hadn't been sold, so I gathered them all in a basket and stood outside the shop just handing out yellow, white, pink, and red roses to those walking past. It made me feel so happy and just in tune with myself and others. In less than ten minutes all the roses were gone.

"My God..." Maria commented as I walked back into the store earlier that day with an empty basket. "You're in a mood, huh?"

"I am, yes," I answered, putting the basket on the counter. "People love getting flowers, you know? We should do that more when we have those that won't sell."