Shame (TP Link x F.Reader)

Deadly

Today was the day. I could feel freedom on my lips and just at the end of my fingertips. I was so close.
As fate would have it  Jerik wanted to take me on a romantic picnic out on Lake Hylia. It was an entire day's endeavor. I didn't know how I felt about this, but I knew I needed to do what was necessary, and right now it was to keep him happy until I was ready to break the news to him.
At the moment I was packing food because apparently when one gets invited to a picnic, the guest has to bring the food instead of the host.
Jerik really did have a backwards way of thinking. I hope he suffers once I break it off with him.
There was a knock at my door. I looked at the time. Hm. He was early. I went over to the door and there Jerik stood with a big bouquet of flowers. Tiger lilies. My favorite. My eyes squint in suspicion. What was he up to?
"Hello, darling." He says giving me a charming smile with his pearly white teeth.
"Hello, Jerik. Are those for me?" I asked pointing to the flowers.
"Of course, love. Who else?" He says handing me the flowers. I could think of quite of few others, but he doesn't have to know that.
"They're beautiful. Thank you." I said dully but forced a smile.
"As beautiful as you." He said simply without looking in my direction like he has said it a million times before. He probably has, but not to me. "Are you ready to go?"
"Almost. I'm just finishing packing up the food."
"Alright. I'll be waiting for you in the coach outside." He says before kissing my cheek then heading out again.
I stared at the door with a dead look. "Thanks for the help, Jerik. Thats so sweet of you." I said to myself sarcastically as I quickly tried to finish up. I ultimately ended up just shoving the knives, forks, and a couple of apples at the very top paying no mind that it didn't close all the way. I grabbed the basket and a blanket and quickly did a once over around the shop to make sure I wasn't forgetting anything. I set the sign out on the door that I'd be back later and headed for the fancy coach that was waiting for me. Jerik swiftly took my items and held the door open for me as I climbed in. "No coach driver today?"
"Nope. Just you and me, Darling." He said climbing in the drivers spot and snapping the reins for the horse to go. I was actually relieved. It meant I didn't have to stare at Jerik's face for an entire couple of hours attempting to make conversation until we got there. I could sit in peace as he drove. Normally the wealthy had drivers. Jerik does, but I noticed he didn't use them often. He preferred to either walk or drive the coach himself. I didn't have the slightest clue why. I only assumed it went with his controlling nature.
I thought about what I was going to say to him. How was I going to end this relationship? Did I just want to say it suddenly or did I want to ease into it. I can't imagine it would make much of a difference. He was going to be upset either way. Very upset. 
I thought about what would Link do. Immediately I rid myself of that thought. Though Link was incredibly brave, I couldn't imagine him being particularly helpful when it comes to navigating love or lack there of. He was pretty closed off in that nature.
Who could I take reference to? Telma? She was beautiful and incredibly bold. She was very open about her love or how she feels about others, but... well... there's a reason she's  still single. She may come off a little too strong. I sighed to myself. It looks like I'll be on my own on this one.
I lean back and close my eyes for a bit trying to calm my nerves. Of course, when you're nervous or scared time seems to slow down at an incredible pace and speed up intensely at the same time. Long enough to make you suffer, but so quickly that it's always seems like not enough time and that's exactly what happened today.
It didn't feel very long before the coach came to a halt and Jerik swung open the coach door.
"We made it." He grinned and I nodded as I began to gather the picnic items. I didn't bother asking him to help. I just had him hold the blanket unprompted while I carried everything else. I felt like the blanket was the easiest and it seemed to be just good enough to where he didn't complain anyway. He held my hand as we walked to the big hill and long dock. There was a little pink and blue bird that was perched on one of the dock pole.
"Oh. Hello" I said leaning down to the bird with a smile. "Aren't you very pretty."
"Plumm  has no need to talk to humans!" The bird squawked making me and Jerik jump a bit startled that it started talking. I blinked before a cheeky smile spreads to my face as I begin to dig around in my basket.
"Well, Plumm. Would you perhaps reconsider for a treat?" I asked taking out a peach and offering it to the bird. The bird let out an excited tittle as it flapped it's wings out wide.
"Awk! Plumm likes fruit!"  I held the fruit closer to the bird and it took a massive peck bite out of the fruit flesh. Drips of fruit juice dropped from the beak as she swallowed the piece of fruit. She squawked again and flapped her wings. She flew a bit in place before flying over and landing herself on my head.
"Oh." I giggled and peered at Jerik who only stood silently curious, but also a bit annoyed.
"Plumm has no need to talk to humans, but Plum likes pretty lady with the fruit!" The pink birds ruffle as she sits on my head.
"Well, here." I held the left over fruit outward. "Take the fruit. It's yours. For my new friend." Plumm immediately flies from my head and snatches the peach from my hand with her beak and flies to a different part of the dock. I laugh outwardly as Plumm digs into her fruit.
"You have more of those, right?" Jerik asked.
I glanced at him, the laugh barely dying down. "Yes. Jerik. Don't worry. I brought more."
"Good." He said and pointed to my head. "The bird messed up your hair by the way."
"Oh." I began to comb my fingers through my hair and pat down the stray hairs.
"I'll grab the boat." He said walking away.
"Boat?" I asked but he ignored me and kept going to go fetch a row boat that was tied farther ways down. I wait patiently for him as he uses the rope to urge the boat to follow his guidance in the water as he walks along the dock.
"You've had this?" I asked him.
"No. Borrowing it from a friend who likes fishing." Jerik stated as he stepped into the boat and held out his hand. "I figured for a one time occasion, he'd lend it to me."
"What's the occasion?" I asked picking up the blanket and tossing it in the boat and grabbed Jeriks hand with the basket in the other. He only smirked with no reply. I hesitantly stepped into the boat and tried my best to keep my balance. The boat seemed average size from a distance, but was actually quite large and spacious once you were seated inside. Jerik sat down across from me and took the ores to the boat and began rowing to the middle of the lake. It was a very lovely day out. The sun was out, but it wasn't hot. It was just cool enough with a light breeze. While Jerik was rowing I took the blanket and laid it on the floor.
"I have various fruit, fire roasted beef loin from a spit, chocolate cluster cake, shortbread cookies, and little cucumber sandwiches.... oh and some strawberry spirits to drink." I listed off. "What would you like first?"
"Just set whatever out." He said with a grunt as he was getting tired from rowing. I decided to just start with something light and bring out the sandwiches and fruit.
He let out a deep huff as he finally made it to what I assume to be the spot he desired in Lake Hylia. Why he wanted to be so far out, I'll probably never know. I offered him some food once he settled and he didn't hesitate to start inhaling the food. It's fair, I suppose. Rowing could be difficult if one isn't use to it. I sat quietly nibbling on one of the sandwich while he got his fill. One after another. He sighed happily once he was satisfied. I had finished my sandwich as I waited for him.
"So. Are you going to tell me why we're out here?" I asked him.
He only gave a chuckle. "You're not one for dramatic effect, are you?"
"Can't say so." I gave an awkard chuckle. "You know me so well."
"Well, I have to say that we've definitely had our ups and our downs..." he says and I look at him confused. Where was he going with this? "But over the last few weeks I think our relationship has grown significantly compared to before." The last few weeks being me too scared to even say anything to anyone? The last few weeks where I have been so sleep deprived I've been paranoid? The last few weeks where everyone around me doesn't seem to want to deal with me anymore because of you? Are we talking about the same last few weeks?
"I think we should take out relationship to the next level." Jerik says reaching into his back pocket and pulling out a diamond ring. That rock was huge! The band was incrusted with smaller diamonds and its shine almost blinds me. Not particularly my taste, but beautiful none the less. "(Y/n)(L/n), will you marry me?" I sat there shocked. Oh Goddesses I was not expecting that. The goddesses were testing me now. I was suppose to end this and now I was in a position to where I could end it or make it worse. Much worse. Breaking Link's heart and spending the rest of my life with Jerik. The thought alone made me want to cry.
"...no..." I whispered almost in horror. His face fell and morphed into one of confusion.
"I'm sorry. What was that, Darling?" He said leaning his ear a bit closer to me. My eyes flicker to his and I spoke up a little more clearly.
"I said no." I gulped. "I... can't marry you."
He blinked a few times before shaking his head. "I-I don't understand. What do you mean, you can't marry me? You love me!"
I shook my head slowly. "No... I don't." I said softly. "Everyday I'm with you, I suffer, Jerik. I can't stand this relationship and... well I was actually going to put an end to our relationship today, but... wanted to wait until the right time."
His nose started to flare but he remained in his seat. "You were going to break up with me?"
I nodded hesitantly. I was becoming fearful and I know he could see it.
"Why?"
I looked at his glare and gulped. He was balling his fists. I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to be honest with him.
"WHY?!" He screamed at me making me jump in my seat.
"W-well... I-I just thought we had grown apart and-"
"LIAR!" He said grabbing me by my hair.
"A-ah!" I whimper in pain and was pulled to my knees in front of him. The boat shook.
He brought my face closer to his.
"It's that bastard, Link. Isn't it?" He spits in my face. "Isn't it?!"
I can only whimper. "He's been pining after you for some time now and I thought I had finally gotten rid of him." Jerik sneers and begins unbuttoned his vest shoving me back. "Only to find out that he's probably had you right up there in that bedroom wearing you out like the whore you are!"
"T-that's n-no-"
"SHUT UP!" He tells pulling my hair again and slapping me across the face. I drop to the side making the boat rock excessively, but Jerik didn't lose his balance even a bit.
"...I bet you two were just having a great time laughing at me, right? You were laughing at me?" I shook my head rapidly. He was fuming red. His chest heaved up and down with his harsh breaths as he threw his vest to the side and began unbuttoning his shirt.
"It's no wonder we never had sex. You were to busy with him!" He sneered throwing his shirt away. He pinned me to the bottom of the boat. "That's it, right?! That fucking hero has already taken your virginity! HASN'T HE?!" He screamed so hard his spit hit my face like rain.
I sobbed. "N-no! I swear!" I begged. "We hadn't been together once! Please..."
"I am so SICK of that stupid piece of shit knight taking what's mine!" He hits his fist on the bottom of the boat next to my face making me let out a scared whimper as I squeeze my eyes shut. "No more!... No fucking more." He says and unbuttoned his pants.
"He's not taking what's mine anymore!" I knew what was about to happen and I try to shuffle away, but he had me by the throat.
"STOP MOVING!!"
"Please, Jerik! I'm sorry!" I pleaded. "Don't do this."
"It's too late for sorry now, Darling. I've warned you time and time again, but you never listened. You are mine and you will be mine forever and you're damn hero boy can't save you."
He says and began tearing at my nice dress that I had wore specifically for this date. I yelled at the top of my lungs for help. He hit my face hard and clasped a hand over my mouth. "You are going to make this worse for yourself, Darling." He says already pulling at my panties. "I suggest you just take it like a good girl and maybe I won't lose my temper."
His words from before hit me like a truck. 'Hero boy can't save you.' It was true. Link wasn't here. Noone was here. I  hadn't told anyone I was coming out here and I was in the middle of a lake. Noone was coming for me. There was no appeasing Jerik. The only thing I can do was fight. So I did. I will fight as hard as I can. I bit Jerik's hand that was covering my mouth and he let out a scream, but didn't budge. He slammed my head back against the boat and kept his hand around my neck. This time there was no threat only action. He began to squeeze. Hard. I felt him move my panties to the side. I fought against him. I clawed at his hand, but his grip only got tighter. I kicked at him and he used his knees to pin them down. I felt him enter into me harshly, ripping my hymen. I yelled not only in pain, but pure horror and distraught. He harshlythrusted his hips. Forcing himself in and out of me. This wasn't how this was supposed to go. I didn't even know Jerik was capable. He was a coward and this only proved so more. I was suppose to be with Link. It was supoose to be him. What was he going to think now that I've been tainted by another man? Jerik no less. Jerik has ruined my life. He has officially taken everything! I reached up and began clawing at his face and eyes. He grunted and bit one of my hands while using his free hand to land another hit to my face. I cried out and he pinned my other hand above me. His thrusts were harsh as I felt the blood running down my thighs and smearing against my butt. The pain was overwhelming but the sounds made it all the worse. How could this happen? My vision was fading as my lack of oxygen was taking it's toll. Jerik's frustrated face was becoming a blur as his hand only tightened further. I kept trying to wiggle, but it was no use. He had me under his complete control. My eyes were rolling to the back of my head. He's about to kill me!
*SQUAWK*
Plumm had appeared flying over and pecking harshly at Jerik's head. He yelled surprised as one hand loosened around my neck and the other let go of my hands all together as he tried to swat her away. I gasped for air.
"Plumm protects pretty lady!" She says pecking harder!
I took the opportunity to look for anything to defend myself. The picnic basket had toppled over and spilled everything in the commotion. I didn't waste a second to stretch over and grab one of the carving knives from the basket.
It's was supposed to be just one stab. One stab to catch him off guard and make an escape... but that one stab was into his neck.... and that one stab led to two... then three.... then six... then 10... I think I had finally stopped and caught my breath at 16. That's when I had realized what I had done. Plumm was nowhere to be seen. All I could see was red staining my hands, my dress, my face. Though no hands were choking me anymore I still felt like I couldn't breath. Jerik's unblinking dead eyes stared right through me. He had stopped breathing long ago... and yet I had kept going. I took in his grotesque mutilated state. Oh Goddesses... what did I just do?
I dropped the knife letting it clatter to the boat floor. I covered my mouth as I sank into myself. I cried. I screamed. I begged for forgiveness.
This... this wasn't suppose to happen! Why?! why?! why?! why?! why?!Goddesses why?!
But... what do I do now? I looked around. My adrenaline still pumping. I was still out in the middle of the lake. I had to get out of here! I tried to reach for the ores, but I stumbled over Jerik's body and fell straight over the side. I tried to grasp the side but my sudden weight just made the whole thing capsize, dumping me, Jerik and everything else into the water. Everything sank but me. I kicked as hard as I could trying to swim back to the surface. I gasped for air after breaching looking for the closest land mass. It was actually the platform leading to the Lanayru spring. I swam pulling myself up onto the steps as I tried to regain my energy. I took deep breaths as the pain from everything was starting to set in. I looked around still panicked as I tried to think of what to do next. The only thing I could do was go back home.
Oh goddesses... home. I just killed Jerik! I... I'll be arrested and sentenced to death for murdering a nobleman's son! Link is going to hate me! Oh my... Link is a knight! The Princess's appointed knight! He's going to be there when she sentences me to death. He's going to be the one to put me in a cell. I'm a murderer now and my best friend is going to be the one to carry out my sentence. I.. this is horrible! ... but Jerik. Jerik was just murdered. I just took his life from him. His family will be devastated. His twisted corpse appeared in my mind making me gag. He raped me! He deserved to die! I gagged again. It was in self defense. I should've stopped after 1, but I didn't. I gagged harder. I didn't mean to kill him.. or did I? At that, I puked in the water. My mind couldn't handle the split argument. My body wracked as my stomach emptied itself. I gasped again as I sat back tiredly on my knees. The Princess wasn't a tyrant. Surely she would understand if I explained, right? Perhaps a less severe sentence? How would I explain? Where would I even begin? This was sick irony. I've suffered for so long! When I finally get the courage to leave and be with the man I love... this happens. This sick... thing... happened. I feel like everything before is now out the window. My life is over.
What's the point in fighting anymore?
I stood to my feet, my legs shaking. I looked to the sky. If I leave now, then maybe I could make it back before the guards lock up the gates. I began my long trek back home. Limping and feeling the pain in between my thighs as more blood was leaking down them.
I've never been more ashamed and embarrassed in my life. Humiliation painted all over my body as I'm sure I looked like a bruised mess. I just wanted my bed at this point. I don't think I could stand to look at anyone else.
It was almost sundown by the time I made it back to Castle Town. I took the time to go around to the west side. Guards don't typically post there until nightfall and people will be on their way home by now. Noone to bother me. I trudged through the gates. My shoes had been lost in the lake. My bare feet were caked in dirt and blood. Regardless I still noticed the familiar sensation of my feet against the cobblestone as I mindlessly walked back home. I let my feet guide me now rather than thinking.
Once my shop comes into sight I crack a smile a bit. It looked like a safe haven but also now a criminals hideout in disguise. My eyes looked at it differently now. I sigh. I lost my key in the lake. I crossed my fingers and tried the handle. Thankfully it was unlocked. Thank the goddesses for my forgetfulness. I trudged into my home, closing the door behind me. I stood there for a moment. My entire body relaxing. Then I let my knees buckle as I drop to the floor. I didn't bother to get up. I laid there exhausted in pain. I needed to be here. I needed to reset. My body couldn't take anymore. My brain couldn't take anymore. I passed out.