Ruthless Sweetness (SELF PUBLISHED)

#12 DRUNKEN CONFESSIONS

It's 7 in the morning and I've been awake for 2 hours,I haven't done my morning routine, haven't got up, haven't got out of liliana's bed,she let me sleep with her since she didn't want me going back in that room either, I spent those 2 hours just starring at the ceiling laying in the bed as Liliana sleeps next to me,her hair all messed up as she's curled up in a ball with the blanket covering her.  I've been thinking, what did I expect? Did I expect flowers and sweet talks from this man? Did I expect him to ignore the world and actually love me ? This is Iglesias Derek who we are talking about ,I shouldn't wallow this,I shouldn't be upset about this because I know who he is . If he's a selfish human being let him be. If he's a big narcissist on my back let him be. I couldn't care less. He said it nice and simple that he can't say that he cares about so why should I? As soon as I have a room and a mansion with my best friend in it, I will live.   "I can't".  I am a fool. I'm a massive fool but at least I got him confess something true. ,Thank you Iglesias for being honest. I won't be seeing him the same . A little word ,a little sentence can cause a lot. "I cant'
He can't. If he wanted to care about me he would treat me nice. Get to know me,know my past.

But he doesn't want too.

I finally get up and tip toe to the bathroom trying my best not to make a sound and wake Liliana up. As soon as I get into the bathroom,I lock the door ,strip down all of my clothes on the floor before I turn on the shower,I flip the wrong faucets and it was shivering. I jump back and go back to redo my mistake and turn on hot water on my head,I close my eyes as the warm water drips on my body warm so warm it makes me smile abit. The little tensions in my body relax and I seem to be breathing more freely.  Lastnight is the last thing i want to think off right now ,i force myself to focus ,i hop out the shower and get dressed. Blue jeans and a lace shirt . I brush my hair out and blow dry them. I get out of the bathroom and liliana is awake . She looking around confused and scared

" oh my gosh ELVIRA!" She touches her hand to her chest and relief floods on her face "what?"i laugh at her reaction.
"I thought you went back oh god goomorning" i sigh and nod at her "goodmorning,and i wont be going back" i turn my back to her and face  the counter and slip on my jewelry,my engagement ring too. Im not wearing it because of him i only wear because i feel naked without it, since i got used with this ring. 

Shebgets uo and walks next to me and  touches my arm "Elvira...are you okay?"  I close my eyes before i answer her, i turn to face her and open my eyes and force a wide smile
"Yeah ,im fine,liliana you snore quite loud "  she gasps   "i do!?" "Abit. But its okay"  "ofcourse.  Its not okay i fucking snore!" "Oh liliana "i shake my head at her  "I'll see you downstairs get ready " i turn around ready to go down but that when she caught my hand"  "wait!-Elvira,will you be okay ?you know hes down there right?"  "Yeah, i do ,whats the worse that can happen ?i womt even talk to him"  she sighs as a worried expression comes on her face "oh god,just be careful." I nod to her before i go down the stairs. Every step i take the harder my breath gets. Im scared,im terrified,i dont want to see him , i dont want to hear any word he has to say even if he isnt talking to me

"Breathe Elvira its okay ,breathe i will be there with you."

I taks a deep breath and shake that memory from my head and i freely walk down stairs,i walk into the kitchen to get water , i open the refrigerator and get the ice to add in my water and i turn and behide me is romeo ,he looks surprised

"Ah- Elvira! Uh goodmorning"
I reply with a smile
"Good morning Romeo,your a morning person?"
"Hell yes i am"
"I figured. " i take a sip of my water.
"Soo" he says shoving his hands in his pockets
"You came downstairs ."
"Yeah i did? Im sorry did you want me to rot in my room-liliana's room?"
"No no im suprised, you did good i just didnt expect you to come."
"Why?" I ask
"Well Elvira i was there lastmight i saw what happend "
"Hes not my fiance ,i dont care"
"You cried when he said that he doesn't care. "  my face turns blank and pale. "Im sorry-"   "i thought he was ny friend and he would atleast care abit but-i was wrong but its not a problem "  he looks down and sucks his teeth and nods "yeah"   "Elvira we have to talk ,later not now though "
"Sure. " i turn around and put the glass on the counter before i walk out the kitchen and in the living room.