Kill, Love, Repeat

Chapter Nouă

This time I'm awake in the police headquarters and almost feeling pain everywhere. I look around me and everyone is lying on the ground. I can't believe I hurt all of these people. I'm finding it hard to breath, but as soon as I'm okay, I scream "fuck!".

There is no way I did this, right? All by myself? I try to walk but I feel an intense pain in my shoulder. It feels awful. I suspect I dislocated my shoulder. I remember once a doctor helped me to fix my dislocated shoulder when I was younger. I take a deep breath, I hold a cloth in my mouth and try to pop it back into its place.

I feel so tired already. I feel like sleeping. But I can't. I need to find him. I just hope he's not dead. So I try to pass by the unconscious bodies and I log into one of their computers and I search for Felix. I found out he's alive. I teared up a little and I memorized the hospital he was in. On my way, I call an ambulance and I exit the horrible place from the back. I could have checked the cameras and erased them. But, what's the point anyway? They remember my face and they might think Felix was helping me somehow.

I need to fix this. I can't but keep beating myself emotionally with memories of everything bad I've done. As I do so, I manage to take a cab run to the hospital and find Felix. I arrive at the hall and I stop in front of his room. Something is keeping my hand from opening the door. I thought maybe I was nervous about seeing him after what I did to him. I take a deep breath and I open the door. I remove the curtain and I don't see him. I'm confused and someone behind me tried to touch my shoulder. I hold her hand and turn.

"Anne? What the fuck are you doing here? How did you find me?" I'm running some theories in my mind but none of them looks realistic.

"My dear Charlotte. How have I missed the real you." She hugs me and I let her. I can't believe she's here. It's been so long. For one second I almost forgot what she just said.

"The real me? what do you mean? And have you seen my...uh detective Felix Avery?" I don't know if I should mention I'm a cold murderer who almost killed her boyfriend.

"He's gone, dear. Probably for the best."

"What?" Anne looks strange to me right now. She seems different.

"Charlotte. We have to go before they come looking for you here."

"How did you know I was here? And if you were in England, why did you call me? I've been looking for you for a long time and you just showed up here?" she's quiet for a few seconds, and then she looks at me.

"We have to go now." she reaches for my hand but I reject her.

"What the fuck is going on?"

She takes a deep breath and starts to step back. "I had a plan. A wonderful plan. Everything was going perfectly until you met this imbecile. Aren't you proud of all the work you've been doing, Mercury?"

"Did I do this, to everyone? Was it really me? I don't understand. How do you know all of this shit?"

"I helped you. With the killings, I mean" she smiles like she's shy.

"What did you do?" Before realising it, I started stepping back like the person who I'm seeing right now isn't who she's saying.

"It's okay. I know you are scared, but there isn't any reason. This has been always you since you left. And you are amazing. You are strong, precise and with so much anger. The pills, work better on you than anyone. Don't you see, sweetheart? This is your destiny. Not some stupid men you met at the bar you work."

She knows everything, the men I have been with, Felix, my house. Everything. Felix was right the day I attacked him. Ann did this to me. But why? I've been speechless for a long time. I try to swallow and try to speak but it comes in a broken voice. "So these pills are making me kill people when I fall asleep? You have been experimenting on me? This is messed up. What else have you been fucking hiding?"