Never feel alone

Chapter 11

The next morning, Stef asked me if I wanted to stay home from school after all I'd been through the day before, but I told her no. I had to be doing something to take my mind off my problems. I had to keep my mind busy so I wouldn't have too much time to think.

When I came in the door after school, Sophia was laying on the couch, watching TV and drinking a Sprite. "Hi, baby," I said, sitting on the arm of the couch. "What did the doctor say?"

"Double ear infection," she told me. Her cheeks were pink and she was covered in a soft blanket. A bottle of ear drops sat on the coffee table next to an untouched plate of crackers.

"Well, I hope you feel better soon," I told her. I leaned down and kissed her warm forehead. "I love you," I said, smoothing back her hair. She was so cute and sweet. I loved her more than anyone in the world. I didn't ever want to imagine my life without her. How long would it be before I'd have to?

She smiled a little. "I love you too, sissy."

Tears stung my eyes, and I turned my head away. "I've got homework," I told her, before hurrying upstairs.

When I got to my room, I flopped down on my bed, facing the wall, and let myself cry as quietly as I could. I wished I could take the last twenty-four hours back. I hated not knowing what mine and Sophia's future held. With our secret out in the open, I felt out of control, and it scared the hell out of me. Touching my forefinger to the bridge of my nose, I rubbed it, just like I used to do when I was little.

I didn't hear Stef come into the room; I was too lost in my thoughts, and I jumped a little when I felt her sit down on the edge of the bed. "Love?" she whispered, laying her hand on my back. "I'm sorry I startled you. You okay?"

I swiped my tears away. I'd cried more since coming to this house than I had in years, but I still wasn't comfortable crying in front of other people. To me, it showed weakness, and I couldn't be weak. I needed to be strong for my sister.

I turned my head to glance back at her. She looked down at me, concerned. "I'm worried," I admitted.

The next thing I knew, Stef moved closer to me and took me in her arms, like I was a little kid. It was a little embarrassing, but it was nice. I felt cozy and protected, snuggled between her and the wall. I wouldn't tell her that though. I was still determined not to fall in love with her and her family. A big part of me still didn't believe this was going to last.

"Tell me about it," she offered. "I want to know what you're thinking right now."

I rubbed my nose again, absentmindedly. "I'm thinking that I wish I never told you guys the truth."

Stef nodded knowingly. "I understand that. But I'm glad you did tell us. And I bet a part of you, deep down, is glad too, because what happened has been weighing down on you, and now you've got it off your chest." Cradling my head, she pulled me a little closer. "What else?"

"I'm worried about my sister, that she could go to jail," I told her. "She's all I have, and I don't want to lose her." My nose started to run and I sniffled a little. "And I feel guilty, because she shot Brian to protect me."

Stef held my gaze. "Would you have done the same thing if you were in Sophia's place?" she asked.

"Yes," I said, without giving it a second thought. "I would do anything for Sophia."

She nodded again. "I think I would've done what she did too, if someone were hurting Lena or you kids," she confided. You kids? I wondered if I'd heard her right, and she'd really meant to include me and Sophia, or if she'd just made a mistake. "Did Brian hurt or threaten you other times before that night?" she asked me.