Shallow Abyss || Zb1

21

Tae Rae got home quietly. He had just come back from his cram academy. His father hadn't come home yet which Tae Rae was really thankful for.

He showered and dived into studying. His mind was lost in his books that he didn't even know when his father got back.

"Tae Rae! Come here" His father shouted from the living room. Tae Rae sighed and got out of his room. After greeting his father, his father looked at him and laughed heartily.

"Take this" His father said and gave Tae Rae a card.
Tae Rae opened the card once again hearing his father's laugh.

"The Prime Minister has invited you to perform in his wife's inauguration ceremony. What a good shot"
He said chuckling in happiness.

"This would give me a lot of money, and to imagine–

"No" Tae Rae muttered as he clenched the card in anger. His father's smile slowly faded. "What?"

His father stood up and looked at him with a grim look. "I'm not doing it" Tae Rae said and looked at his father.

His father immediately slapped him. Tae Rae's head fell in the direction of the slap. His father gritted his teeth as he looked at him.

"You ungrateful fool. You can't thank me for bringing this worthy opportunity to showcase your talent to the world. You don't know how much I've done for you—

Tae Rae interrupted him by bitterly chuckling.

"Ungrateful?" Tae Rae asked and scoffed.

"You never asked me once!! What I want to do!!!" He shouted for the first time. He had been enduring the pain for so long.

"I hate singing on stage, I'd rather die...I don't want to do it" Tae Rae muttered as his eyes got clouded with tears. His father's face still remained the same.

"I hate my school, I hate singing and I hate this house too!!! They're all suffocating me to death!!"
He shouted and started crying.

His father kept quiet as Tae Rae cried in pain.
"I'm only trying to make your dreams come true"
His father said and Tae Rae laughed.

"Dreams? I...I don't like people asking me about my dreams. You don't know stressful it is, do you? You took singing, the one thing I truly loved and exploited me and here you are talking about dreams"
Tae Rae said bitterly smiling.

His father sighed and held Tae Rae's shoulders.
"Listen to me Tae Rae, I'm doing this to give you a good life. I don't want you to suffer. You should live a successful life"

Tae Rae yanked his father's hands away from him.
"My life?...Do I have a life? This is your life- fuck I'm sick and tired of this" Tae Rae said chuckling as he brushed his hair backwards.

"Don't you get it?! You're suffocating me to death!" He shouted as more tears fell.

"Why did you make decisions over MY life and forced it on me?" He muttered and looked at his father in disbelief.

"Cheer up", "Do your best", the more I hear them, the more demotivated I feel. I'm already doing my best with everything I have. I'm supposed to do better than best?" Tae Rae scoffed

"How much more and how to do? It makes me feel pessimistic...I don't even know why I'm telling you these, knowing fully well that you don't care"
Tae Rae muttered holding back his tears.

"I just wish that...you were the one that died and not mom" Tae Rae said and his father's face changed.
Tae Rae threw the card on the floor and ran out of the house.

He stopped running when he got to the bus stop. He sat on the bench and started crying. He felt so lost and lonely. He was tired of bottling up his feelings.

He stood up and started walking, not knowing where his feet would take him. He was lost in his thoughts and feelings when he saw himself in front of a familiar house.

He sighed and rung the doorbell. The door quickly opened and Tae Rae saw Gunwook. Gunwook quickly held Tae Rae and looked around his body in panic.

"Hyung.. are you alright? Are you hurt?" He worriedly asked looking at Tae Rae's red face.
Tae Rae immediately started crying making Gunwook worry more. He quickly brought Tae Rae in and took him up to his room.

"Hyung take this" Gunwook said and gave Tae Rae a glass of water to calm him down. After the minutes of silence Gunwook gave Tae Rae to calm down,
Tae Rae finally spoke.

"I ran away from home...I got angry at my father and ran away. I just..I just couldn't hold it anymore, I feel sorry that i don't regret it" Tae Rae said and Gunwook scooted closer and held Tae Rae's hands.

"No Hyung, you shouldn't feel sorry. I'm sure you had your reasons" Gunwook said and Tae Rae nodded. "I just feel like I'm living my father's life. I feel like I was born just to fulfill my father's dream"
Tae Rae said and looked at Gunwook.

"As I follow the signs that my father chooses, I feel like I'm losing myself" Tae Rae said smiling and Gunwook sighed. He slowly hugged Tae Rae because he knew Tae Rae needed it.

"Hyung...If you're in pain, Please just rest. Whatever the reason, If you're in pain, you're in pain. If things are tough, things are tough...Don't pretend to be strong. Why should you smile and bottle up your feelings when things are tough?" Gunwook said.

He leaned out of the hug, still looking at Tae Rae.
"It's okay to run away..-no..it's not that you're running away, you didn't do anything wrong. It's not that important for you to go through all this.
You don't have to be so hard on yourself...Hyung, I'm here for you. I'll always be, so please, don't feel helpless next time" Gunwook said gently rubbing Tae Rae's hand.

Tae Rae, after hearing all the comforting words Gunwook said, he couldn't help but feel the walls he tried so hard to build, fall. He quickly hugged Gunwook as he cried, grateful that he has a good friend like him.