Six

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Sloans POV





He spoke to me. He spoke actual words. And it wasn't him calling me 'tiger' and he wasn't annoyed with me. It was a real conversation he was trying to have. It made my heartbeat at an incredible pace. It felt like electricity was buzzing through me and making me levitate. 

And then he joked. He made a joke not about me, but to me. And I laughed...He even asked about Z, which slightly threw me off. And I wish he didn't because I was immediately flooded with guilt knowing he shouldn't have been asking me that. 

What the fuck is going on?

And I was a dumb ass and couldn't think of anything to say back to him. I had dreamed of a moment like that for YEARS and I couldn't say anything. My mind went blank. I would literally spend hours upon hours having fake conversations in my head with him growing up. Having a list of questions to ask him to get to know him. And when given the opportunity...

I fucking choke. 

Pathetic.

I could see the disappointment in his eyes, though he tried to hide it. But I saw he was upset I didn't say anything. It twisted my stomach and it made me want to throw up. On top of the fact that he was obviously in pain from the bruises. The bruises I caused. My head was hurting because of all the emotions I was feeling at the same time.

I'm pissed. And so is Loren.

'I'm more than pissed. I'm furious.'

I've fantasized and dreamed of conversations with Carter, here I was presented with the opportunity and I fumbled it. Badly.

Who knows if he will even try and talk to me again?

But what's even more strange is that he has yet to say anything about us being mates. I would have thought by now he would have rejected me, but maybe he is just waiting until the end of the week when he can be away from me.

'Or perhaps he has accepted us.' Loren tumbled out which surprised me.

Loren doesn't talk to me much, he usually responds with grunts, growls, and purrs. You know animal shit. So when he does talk, I listen.

But THIS...I couldn't listen to it. Because the moment I get comfortable he's going to drop the ball. And it's going to hurt badly. So badly.

We were now at my uncle Ray's barbershop and it was bustling. I sat in the corner and I just watched. I already got my cut and I was waiting on my pops to finish his trim and Carter. But I didn't mind waiting. It gave me time to ogle Carter and watch him. He was so pretty sometimes. But in the most masculine way and I wanted nothing more than to worship him.

To dose him in praise and tell him how amazing he was. It was weird, but I felt this deep urge to hold him close to me...and cuddle. I don't know, I've never been one to cuddle but something about Carter made me want to protect him. I didn't quite understand it, but from a young age, I felt like he needed it. 

I failed in that aspect. I left for two years like a coward, but now that I am back..that feeling has intensified. Sure, sex was something I wanted. I mean, of course, it was something I wanted. He was fucking glorious and I knew it would be the best thing I've ever experienced in my life. But somehow I knew deep down, that it would be more than sex. It would be...I don't know yet. 

I just wanted Carter. 

Not for what his body provided, and not even for what he provided. But him.

There was something about him that made him so special to me. Even before I knew we were mates. My mates just confirmed what I already knew and already felt since I was a kid. 

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