Carter's Savior

Thirteen

Carter's POV

What is happening to me?

Somehow Sloan has figured out how to break down a few of my walls and I found myself somewhat comfortable around him. I realized I only thought he was unbearable as because I saw what he could do to me. He could make me be myself. I can't fake or front with him. He makes me want to be real and that in itself is terrifying.

I don't think I've ever been real to anyone my entire life.

And then there was that moment in the kitchen. I don't think he meant anything by it but my goddess, was it heavy. I was drowning in the sparks between us. It was running up and down my arm, borderline caressing me.

Then the way he was staring so intensely and was in command. Goddess, I hated it. I hated that I fucking loved it. I hated that I loved how domineering he'd become and how I let him. His voice and demeanor changed within an instant and it gave me whiplash. He went from joking and lighthearted, to demanding and intense. But I loved it.

He had gone upstairs once the lasagna was done and said he needed to shower. That's all we've said to each other since that moment in the kitchen. My head was spinning unsure of what to do or say to him next. But I wondered if he was going to kiss me...

It looked like he wanted to and I couldn't help but want to know what that feels like. How do you tell someone that you're not a virgin far from it actually, but you also have never kissed anyone? That was the one thing I held sacred. It made sex too intimate and too real. But when Sloan looked at me like that it made me feel...excited? So again I ask, what the fuck is wrong with me.

'You're down fucking bad, kid.' Tatty's familiar teasing voice came back and pranced through my head. I couldn't even stop the smile on my face even if I tried. Tatty truly was my best friend.

'Tatty! You dick, fuck you. I missed you.' I told him which earned me a laugh but only for a second.

'I'm so sorry, Carter. I vowed to protect you and I--I didn't. I failed you and I am ashamed.' I groaned in annoyance at his words.

'Tatty shut the fuck up. I don't give a shit about a vow or anything. You're back, that's all that matters.'

'I mean I couldn't leave you for too long, your thoughts are extremely loud.' I could almost hear the smirk in his voice and I rolled my eyes at him.

'Whatever!'

'Don't whatever me. You're the one that wants to get dick down by our mate.'

'Of course, you come back and that's the first thing you say.'

'I'm just happy is all. Sloan could be good for you if you give him a try. Now, Loren on the other hand I think I might steer clear of that big guy.'

'What's wrong with him?' I asked him curiously. Tatty rarely talks about his mate Loren, and what Sloan doesn't know is that is the reason I call him a tiger. I don't know exactly what happened to the two of them, but it was enough for Tatty to hold a distaste toward him.

'Doesn't matter. As long as you're happy, I can be cordial with the animal.' I chuckled lightly, finally feeling like my full self was back once again. 'So, you want to talk about why you went quiet?'

I knew the question would eventually be asked. Tatty knew me too well to where I couldn't even hide it, even while he was dormant.

'You know what happens when I talk. Something bad always does.' As I told him I felt heavy emotions entering my body, emotions I have been ignoring the past few days. Letting myself get wrapped up in this bubble Sloan and I are in.