Meretricious | Professor Lupin

111. I do

"How do you want to be remembered?" Snape asked.

Spencer chuckled, "this again?"

"I'm sure your answer has changed" he replied.

Spencer sighed, standing up and walking around his room.

"What if we change the question. Where do you see yourself in ten years? Not precisely a job but how are you living? Who surrounds you? How do you picture your bedroom or apartment?"

Spencer picked up a wolfsbane potion he had lying around, she stared at the color.

"Did I tell you he asked me that? He asked what I wanted in our place... and as you ask me that question I'm realizing I still want the same things."

"I assumed you two talked about decorating" he answered.

"We did" she nodded.

"Tell me what you want, not what the two of you wanted."

"In ten years time I want to live in a house with windows," she looked up at him, "Big windows not small ones" she put the potion down and continued walking around the room.

"I actually hate when the sun hits my face in the morning and causes me to wake up but I love the natural sunlight in my room" she chuckled.

"I want a house big enough for a kitchen table that can interchange between four and twelve" she started cleaning out his cabinet.

"I don't want the house to be too big though, I'll probably live by myself and feel the depth of my aloneness in every room" she said, her back to him.

"Why do you think that?"

"You asked in ten years time" she answered.

"So?"

"I'm 18 right now, add ten and I'm 28. People my age... they know what they want. They know where they want to work, they have an idea as to the person they want to spend their life with, my friends will probably have children or something. My point is, people have plans. I don't have nor know any of that" she shrugged.

"You'll probably think this is stupid and naive of me but I thought I had it. The plan... the one. I thought I was going to marry him, in my head I was going to spend the rest of my life with him. And I know, I know, I'm young. But gods that feeling in my chest? I'm never going to feel that again."

She took a deep breath, "so at 28 I'm surprised I'll even be alive. That's why I'm settling on a house, a house I get to decorate."

He nodded.

"Alright then, what do you wish to see?"

"I don't want to wish" she rolled her eyes to herself. "Whatever happens, happens."

"Indulge me" he replied.

"Well I certainly don't wish to be alone" she answered.

"Obviously" he nodded. "Give me a scenario you would like to live."

"I don't like this game."

"Don't you think it's interesting?"

"No, not when you won't tell me what you're thinking about my answers" she responded.

"I'll tell you about what I think at the end. For now, give me a scenario. It can be simple, like the table one you said earlier."

She sighed, "a dishwasher" she spoke.

"A dishwasher" he repeated.

"I don't know how to work one, I'd like someone to teach me."

"Someone?"