metulji - jan peteh

A little off

Of course, I immediately rushed back into the room once we'd finished eating, telling Jan not to disturb me, which I knew he wouldn't anyway. I'd put some time into filling the empty drawers with my clothes while I was drunk the previous night - apparently I become more organised as my sobriety decreases. Despite there only being a few outfit options, I made it work, choosing some bootcut jeans with a pretty black long-sleeve that cinched perfectly around my waist. Once I was dressed, and done posing in the mirror, I grabbed my makeup bag and rushed out of the bedroom - throwing the door open and almost smashing it into the wall. I flinched when I thought it was preparing to make a rectangular indent into the pristine paper lining, but luckily it narrowly avoided impact, stopping mere centimetres before it. Breathing a low sigh of relief, my feet hit the laminate flooring, making a beeline for the bathroom.

I noticed that nobody else was awake yet - Jan had told me that Jure slept like a cat, after which the rest of the band had laughed. It must have been an inside joke. The only noise eminating from the entire apartment was Jan pottering around the living area, probably cleaning up and waiting for me to be done in his room.

'I'll clean up.' I offered, leaving my chair before attempting to take both of our plates over to the sink. Suddenly looking alarmed, he joined me, standing up incredibly quickly before stealing mine from my place.

'Jan, you cooked.' I practically begged, but before I had enough chance to put a half-decent pledge in, he had already removed the cutlery too and placed them in the dishwasher.

'Jan?' I was unsure as to whether he was even listening anymore; his eyes were wide and slightly unsettling.

'It was my offer, let me clean the mess.' he smiled afterwards, and although a wave of cold relief rolled over me, I still sensed that something was off. Only a very slight tinge hung in the air, but it was enough to dampen the mood slightly - and I think Jan was far more affected than I was.

Snapping out of the thought, I entered a different room - it was now time to attempt my makeup inside the mess of a bathroom. Clothes lay strung along the floor, evidence of a few showers over the last few days. I noticed Jure's shirt on the floor, and wondered how it had got there, given that he had ended up shirtless long before the end of last night. Choosing not to focus too much on the question, I invested all of my thoughts into applying a gentle look of concealer and eyeliner, prior to curling my eyelashes and laying on my waterproof mascara. I didn't really have many other choices - being me, I had forgotten to pack a blending sponge, or half of my brushes, as per usual. Due to this, I ended up blending my concealer in using nothing other than my own fingers. Lovely.

Since my energy was entirely endorsed in ensuring that I looked as good as possible, I became completely oblivious to my surroundings. All that remained was me and the mirror, and a few stray thoughts littered around my brain about the day to come. That was probably why I was unable to hear the movement occurring around me, or see the quickly approaching shadow from the distance.

'Jan, you just have to prepare yourself.' a voice spoke loudly, producing sound which reverberated into the room. Although I wasn't doing anything suspicious, I jumped into place immediately, concealing the bag containing my products behind my frame and accidentally attaining a very stressed expression.

I don't think he saw me either, because he stepped into the bathroom before immediately covering his eyes up and exiting as swiftly as he arrived.

'We all know I get first use of the bathroom.' he exclaimed, sounding slightly irritated.

'Sorry.' I replied, knowing I was about to shock him with my feminine voice, given that I wasn't one of the boys. I could practically feel him freeze, and the entire corridor was rendered silent for a few minor seconds. I laughed. 'It's just my makeup, you can come in.'

Cautiously, he poked his head around the door, almost as if to check I was telling the truth, but evidently not doubting me enough to not come in at all. From this angle, Bojan looked comically short. Seeing that I wasn't lying, he stepped in, sort of awkwardly bowing as he did. He came over to stand next to me, and grabbed a small canister of dry shampoo from the disorganised pile that I assumed was the band's hygiene products. Opening it, he left the room, spraying it into his hair, before reentering to massage it into his scalp.

'You should prepare yourself too.' he said. I gave him a quizzical look; I was already pretty prepared for the day ahead, without the need for his input. Noticing my face, he stopped talking completely. He now seemed more intent on ensuring that no white spots remained in his hair; any present ones were quickly erased with a few seconds of careful brushing.

Jan told me he planned to take you out today.' he said absentmindedly, investing all of his energy into perfecting his hairstyle, his mouth now hanging open slightly.

'Yes. I'm not too sure where though.' I offered hopefully, praying that I would be able to spark a conversation despite his current state of nonchalance. I received no immediate reply, so I picked up one of the few brushes I'd remembered and lightly dusted it over my face. After a few seconds, I'd be able to leave normally, making it less awkward than if I just walked out right as he came in.

'Are you sure you're feeling okay after last night?' he asked suddenly, making eye contact with me through the mirror. His expression felt genuine, the warmth radiating from him in a light glow.

'You remembered?' I laughed, shocked that he'd managed to keep any of the prior night's events in his head due to his lack of sobriety. 'And to answer the question, I'm fine.'

'Okay.' This was followed by utter silence again as Bojan teased his hair. I seized the opportunity and began to leave the room, grasping the door in my left hand and beginning to shut it. 'Lilia, don't be put off when he's awkward. He means well.' he chuckled lowly. Great; now Bojan was playing the wingman. Lovely. I reentered to nod briefly, before finally making my way back to the living room.

'Lilia.'

I'd already passed our bedroom door, yet now I heard a very familiar voice from behind me.

'Jan.' I turned around to meet his stare. He grinned at me weakly, like he had something heavy on his mind. His stance in the doorway made him look even taller, with his hand stretching up the length of it as far as it could reach. His small smile quickly folded into a smirk, as he beckoned me toward him and, once i reached for his hand, proceeded to run down  down the corridor, obviously eager to leave the apartment.

Once we'd reached the door, which he opened for me, he remarked, 'I'm surprised none of the other guys are up.'

'I'm not. Did you see Jure last night?' I laughed, but he didn't reply, just remained speechless.

'True.' Silence reigned the area as he shut the door and began to move towards the elevator.

'Jan, what's up?'

'Nothing, probably just the hangover.' he answered quickly. Too quickly for my liking. I grabbed his hand, causing him to turn around slightly to face me. Despite trying to replace his expression, I could still see a stressed knit in his brow and a few stray wrinkles on his forehead, like his brain was crumpled in worry.

'Jan, what is up? You were fine before.' I pressed, not wanting to force him into telling me why he had suddenly gone so distant, but also desperate to know. I searched his face for answers that didn't appear. 'Did Bojan say something? Come to think of it, he seemed a bit off.' I thought, wondering why he had acted so oddly when he entered the bathroom.

'Not really. He made fun of the breakfast, but apart from that, nothing. Maybe that's it.'

I was glad he'd communicated that much with me, so I stopped with the questions after that.

~•~

HELLO EVERYONE! it has been a WHILE. first things first, thanks for all the love while i've been gone!! second, i'm sorry about this piece, it's not my best work but it was needed to get the story to where it has to be for its next Jan POV, which is the next chapter!! i'm going to start regularly writing again, hopefully 1-2 chapters a week, which is exciting!! i hope you're all ready to bring this story to the big turning point; it's coming very soon.