Syndicates //

xiv

Harry went upstairs with the rest of the boys. I figured he had forgotten that I was watching Friends tonight. Or maybe he didn't want to make it an every-night thing. I played the episode after the one I remember watching last. I guess it's worth catching up to where he left off.

"Wait, wait," I hear a harsh whisper from the top of the stairs.

I turn around and see Harry jogging down and say, "I thought you weren't coming."

"I just didn't want to make a big deal out of it," he says. Around the stair railing, he comes and sits a little closer to me than last night. It's not like I'm counting the space between us, but I do notice it.

His proximity raises so much anxiety in me, but a good anxiety. It makes my stomach and my spine go numb. I guess it's like butterflies in your stomach. I'm probably just really out of practice with being close to anyone. My intake of human interaction prior to joining the 04 was strictly business. I haven't had a friend in a long time.

"Mind if I share the blanket?" he asks. I hand him a cone and shift the textile over to him so that we have an equal amount. He shifts a little back to me.

As we watch, we laugh and enjoy the show mixed with our company. "Who do you think we'd be in Friends?"

"Like the whole 04?" he clarifies.

"Yeah."

"Hm," He thinks. "Louis and Niall are absolutely Joey and Chandler. Who exactly is who, I'm not too sure. I would be Ross. Or no... maybe Liam. Actually, Liam would be Monica. He's very to-the-tee about a lot of things."

"I think it's a question that's easier to ask than to answer," I laugh. "There's no friend group quite like this show."

"That's true," Harry agrees. "Maybe we need to compare ourselves to the Sopranos or something."

We keep watching the show and got through quite a few episodes. Three episodes in was already over an hour. I wasn't sleepy at the least.

Then by five episodes in we were absolutely immersed. My mind was completely taken off of anything about the heist or anything beyond the outside. Even around the living room, I was focused in on the antics of the show.

Netflix paused the start of the sixth and asked yet again if we were watching. I turned to Harry to see if he wanted to go to bed, but it seems at some point he already had. His eyes were shut, relaxed so they weren't pinched. His jaw was relaxed and left his mouth just barely open. He was still, aside from the rise and fall of his chest. His arms stayed folded as a position of self-soothing. He's probably been sleeping for most of this episode. Whoops.

I don't have romantic feelings for him. Even if I did, I shouldn't. That would totally disrupt the 04, how we live, how we work. And of course, if anything happened to him or to me in this dangerous life of ours, then what? I'd feel so guilty. That's why Niall and I broke up. My brain is telling me "no" on this one, too. Let's also not forget that he kidnapped me.

But he looks so comfortable. So peaceful. I know he's probably done some crazy shit— shot someone, stolen things, and that's what we're about to do in a couple days, but here he is asleep and so innocent.

I wanted to lay down but I also didn't want to wake him, so I used the arm of the sectional to support my pillow, and turned sideways to lay down, leaving my feet handing off the couch as if I were sitting and then laid down. I didn't mind the lack of leg space, I still had plenty to lay down and be comfortable.

I shut the TV off. I was partly hoping the silence and complete darkness would wake him if he weren't entirely asleep yet, but he was definitely in a deep sleep already.