Roses from Tears

How it begins

I was 12 years old when my father left. He didn't choose to leave but it was best for our family, best for me and my sisters safety, and best overall. He is a porn addict. My mom found programs for him and although we and DCF urged him to go to them if he wanted to come home he decided he would rather continue to remain in sin then return home and keep his promises. Whatever they found on his work (a prison) computer was bad enough that my mom was given full physical and legal custody of us which is not normal in the state I live in. I can't even explain everything we went through, how the stress tore up our family, the emotional trauma that we are still healing from because it would take so long. That is how the seeds started to be planted that grew into the weeds that are still being weeded from my hearts garden. I was curious. Curious what made this thing so special that my father chose it over us, curious to what it even was, curious about sex in general. So one day on my little tablet on Wikipedia I looked it up and found all sorts of things. Yes it wasn't full blown porn but there were images and descriptions. I was disturbed but captivated at the same time, however I knew it was bad and put it away. And that was that but the damage was already done, the seed was planted. That's all it takes, one look. Guard your eyes friends, look away, don't take a second look. That leads to a further downfall, trust me, I learned the hard way.

God bless! Praying for all of you! The story will continue next chapter.

JN 🤍