Chapter Ten: Can't Stop, Won't Stop

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Our Secret Betrayal

Chapter Ten: Can't Stop, Won't Stop

Another Week Later

I stretched with a yawn. Yet another photoshoot has been completed. Things were starting to look up for me again. My life was getting back on track. My manager Lisa, and I were back on good terms. I was finishing all of my gigs on time, I got five spreads in the major three teen magazines in the entire world! I was even nominated for this year's 'Upcoming Teen Talent' award. Lola, and I even made it to a better place in our relationship.

I couldn't be more happier right now. Unfortunately, I will have to head back to LA in about a week.

My phone's ringtone suddenly started blurting out. I hurried up and answered the call without even glancing at the called id.

"Hello?"

"Why hello Jamie Hertz!" Screamed an excited sounding Lisa.

I furrowed my eyebrows as I tried to figure out what in the hell was she talking about. Who was Jamie Hertz and why was she calling me that?

"Who? I'm sorry but I think you have the wrong number." I informed the caller.

She giggled. "No Christen! You just got the role of Jamie Hertz for the new movie 'The IT Crowd'. You know the movie that you've been attending school to reference for? You got the part!"

My jaw dropped and I let out a high pitched squeal. I got the part? I got the part!

"I know, I know! It's exciting, but it's also very serious work Christen. This is our big break behind losing the Stardom episode so don't blow it or your entire career will be completely destroyed." She warned sternly.

I gulped before nodding. "I won't mess this up! I promise."

"Good. Now we need to talk about something else." She stated in yet another very serious tone.

My eyebrows furrowed. "Sure." I replied.

"I need you to stop that disastrous scandal with that guy."

My heart suddenly dropped. What? She wants me to stop the scandal that she told me to do in the first place? Why? What has changed?

"Um, why? It was all your idea." I could feel my heart breaking up into tiny little pieces. It was true that Lola and I were in a good place now, but it's also true that I never stopped sneaking around with Roman. If it's not for my career, what other reason do I have to do so?

"I know hun, but the truth is I just wanted to make you suffer because of all the stress you were inflicting on me. You made my management look like a joke! I couldn't believe that you actually fell for the stupid lie in the first place. If you have a secret affair with your sister's boyfriend it wont make the guy look bad. It'll make you look like a nasty slut who doesn't respect boundaries. A terrible look for someone whose trying to make it to the top. Especially, since you're already publicly dating Stephen." She confessed with no sympathy for what she's done at all.

I could feel tears slowly falling down my cheeks. Are you serious? This entire time I have only survived the guilt because I thought that I was doing all of this for my career.

I was so caught up in having an excuse for my reasons for wanting to be with Roman that I didn't even realize that I was the one who was ruining my own career.

How dumb could I have been? Of course there's no valid reason for having sex with my sister's boyfriend behind her back! I hurt my sister, and the worst part about it is I never cared and blamed her for it.

I had to fix this. I had to finally own up and take responsibility for what I've done no matter the deserving consequences.

"Lisa you are a deceiving, manipulating bitch and you're fired!" I yelled into the phone, and pressed the end button.

She's been stringing me along with all of these promises of fame, and even though she was a very productive manager she's way too sneaky to leave the fate of my career and life in her hands.

I angrily swiped my tears away. I jumped into my car and drove all the way home. I had to set things straight.

I had to do the right thing, something that I haven't done in a long time. Lola was at work so I guess I'll start off with the one person that all of this mess started off with.

I sent him a text telling him to meet me at the house.

After a half an hour ride home, I finally pulled up into the driveway. My mom wasn't home because she had an interview, and my dad was at work like always.

I stormed into the house, and not a minute later there was a knock at the door. I took a deep breath. I was tired of feeling guilty and I was angry. It's true that I was in the wrong myself but at the same time he was no better than me.

I threw the door open and I opened my mouth to tell him off. To tell him that I was done with this whole mess. To tell him that we were through. To tell him that he didn't deserve my sister. To tell him that he was nothing but an asshole and a player.

I had intentions of telling him all of this yet when he was standing right in front of me with his grassy green eyes, black messy hair, and breath taking body, my mouth wouldn't move. My brain wouldn't function and I stood there frozen.

He pulled me close, his arms snaking around my waist his soft lips calling me. He slammed his mouth on mine and that was it. All of the anger, all of the guilt, all of the shame flew right on out the window as he roughly kissed me all over. He closed the door behind him, and his hands landed straight on the back of my thighs as he lifted me up and my legs wrapped around his waist. He kissed me passionately, he nibbled on my bottom lip and I couldn't stop myself.

I had no control over any of this. I hated myself for the way I let him control me. I hated myself for the way I let him make me feel. I hated myself for the way I let him mean more to me than my own sister.

He carried me all the way upstairs never breaking the kiss. He closed my bedroom door behind us and laid me down on the bed. His hands roamed every inch of my body as he roughly pulled my clothes off of me. All I could do was lay there helplessly and willingly as he devoured my body like a wild animal. He ripped off his own clothes before laying on top of me.

With him I didn't need the four play, all I needed was his body on mine. He licked, kissed, and sucked on my neck. He pulled on my hair. I gave his back a few scratches in return. In this moment it was just him and I and nothing else mattered.

Not my shame, not my career, not my guilt, and not even my little sister.

"I know it's wrong. . . but I just can't stop." I moaned loudly.

I always knew that what I was doing was unforgivable, but I knew that I had hit an all time low when I turned my head towards the picture on my end table. The picture of my little sister and I making our first promise and I grabbed it and turned it over, face down.

"Roman!" I moaned out loudly as he gave me everything he had.

I had played this scenario out in my head and in my dreams over and over a million times and never would I ever have prepared myself for what was about to happen next.

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