+TYPED OUT-

++THE LINES-

"So you told her?"

"Yes."

"And how do you feel, Kenneth?"

Kenneth swiped a hand across his forehead and let out a nervous giggle, "I feel like I'm walking outside naked."

"You feel vulnerable?"

"Yes, and I hate it."

"How did she react when you told her?"

I love every bit of you, Mr. Kenneth Theodore Mosely.

"She told me she loved me," Kenneth sat up, realizing he didn't tell Monday he was crazy about her.

"Isn't that what you wanted to hear?"

"Yes, it was the only thing I wished to hear. I longed to hear those words from her," Kenneth replied.

"And you feel naked despite that?"

Kenneth rose and walked to his window, "Yes, I let her into my garden. I gave her the keys." Kenneth looked down, "I even told her I was afraid of heights, but I didn't tell her living here was a catharsis and that looking down reverted many suicidal thoughts. She knows so much about me already."

"Is it bad?"

"ㅡNo."

"Do you trust her?"

"Yes."

"Do you love her?"

Kenneth came back to his seat. He covered his face with his hands and leaned back," Oh God, yes, I love her."

Doctor Ross wiped his eyes, "that's great news, Kenneth."

"Great, you say," Kenneth sat back up, "she knows I have all these issues. How long do you think she will support my mood variations and behavior?"

Doctor Ross noted something on his notepad before saying, "You said she didn't realize something was going on with you until you said it, and you also told me she loves you. Why are you looking for excuses, Kenneth? It's not a toxic trait you have. It's a mental disorder."

"I wish it were a toxic trait; at least one can work to eradicate it. I can't do that with what I have. I wake up daily fearing myself and praying not to have a new diagnosis of bipolar I or II."

"But you haven't had an episode for ages. What happened at the brunch doesn't count. Being purposely triggered doesn't count. You've been doing very well. Listen to yourself, Kenneth, you've been thrilled since you've met her. Can't you enjoy the moment?"

"I'm afraid. Ever since I've met her, I've started to have weird thoughts about children, and I can't help thinking they'll be like me." Kenneth paused for a second; what if? I should stop everything. Monday deserves a normal man. One that can assume the role I can't have."

Doctor Ross raised an inquisitive brow, "Kenneth, aren't you a firm believer that normality is a social construct? Since when is normality even a criteria?"

Kenneth's fears were somewhat justified for the doctor. Cyclomatia tends to run in genetics. Thus, Kenneth could hand down his disorder, but to say he wasn't normal wasn't right.

Doctor Ross adjusted his posture and crossed his legs, "Have you ever been to the casino, Kenneth?"

"Oh, please, for the love of the moon, don't tell me about the luck factor. I can't place my whole relationship on a number of a roulette table."

"Kenneth, every relationship goes on the roulette table. Life is too full of uncertainties. One only knows they'll win once they place the bet. The adrenaline and euphoria are all part of the game. What you're feeling isn't necessarily linked to your condition but to what everyone experiences when they fall in love deeply. You can ask any person in love the same question. You'll find they feel the same way."