Loss united them. Will it also tear them apart?
When her staff abandon her before opening her new restaurant, Sophie, an aspiring chef who refuses to move past the death of her fiancée must let the charming military man Max into not just her bed but...
Sophie placed Finn's phone on the restaurant table. His cool blue gaze fell to the device, then back to her, his lips pressing into a firm line.
Beside him, Emily bounced Lucy on her knee. "Where's Max?"
"He's not coming." The ache that had lodged itself in Sophie's heart once she'd told Max she couldn't see him again flexed. She pressed her hand against her breastbone as if the pressure could quell the pain. "He returned to the base early."
Emily took Sophie's hand in hers. "What happened?"
Unable to meet Emily's gaze, Sophie studied the silverware. "We broke up."
"No." Her friend's fingers flew to her mouth.
Finn pushed back his chair. "Excuse me." He plucked up the phone and strode to the exit. Sophie followed his tall form, the guilt of breaking Max's heart layered over by Finn's potential disappointment in her.
She couldn't blame Finn for not being able to stand Sophie's presence. After Max had left the apartment, she herself had been overcome with nausea and spent the morning curled up on the couch. The thought of canceling lunch altogether had cemented in her mind, but Sophie was aware she couldn't hide in Emily's condo forever. Unlike with Thomas, Sophie knew at that moment Max was alive and, for the most part, well. He was obviously hurt by her words, but Sophie was sure he'd recover, that he'd find love again. That notion had made her stomach roll, and she'd had to breathe through her mouth to calm the boiling acid.
"I can't believe Max ended things." Emily shook her head.
Mary glared at Sophie. "He didn't, did he Sophie."
Sophie ran a thumb along the dull edge of her knife. "No. I broke up with him."
"Why?" Emily's wide eyes searched hers. "Why would you do such a thing?"
"Because she's afraid." Mary's words cut across the table.
"I'm not—"
"Don't lie to us." Mary jabbed a finger into the white tablecloth. "You can try to lie to yourself, but you can't lie to us." Her hand waved in the air. "I thought he was the one. Even if he wouldn't have been my choice for you."
Sophie bit her lip to hold back the words, 'Max is perfect for me.'
"Mary," Emily admonished.
"What? I tell it like it is." Mary crossed her arms. "If Sophie was going to fall in love again, I'd rather it be with a neurosurgeon or a lawyer." Emily winced, along with Sophie. Thomas and Emily had met in law school. Ignoring those looks, Mary barreled on. "Anything but another man in the military."
"Hey." Emily glared at her sister. "Being in the military is just as noble as being a doctor or lawyer. Maybe even more so."
Mary dismissed the comment and focused on Sophie. "Despite my opinion on his profession, none of that matters because Max captured your heart. Sure, at first the attraction was the muscles or whatever. But even I can't deny his more than that. He's kind and loyal. A bit too quiet for my liking, but he has one quality I adore in the perfect man for you."
"And that is..." Sophie held her breath.
"Obviously completely in love with you."
The self-inflicted knife in Sophie's heart twisted. He'd said the words last night after expressing them physically, and then she'd torn his heart out. She was a monster.
"You don't love him?" Emily's voice was gently, prodding.
Sophie couldn't force the denial out. Because it would be a lie. Loving him was not the problem. That was incredibly easy. Too easy. The issue was the act of loving him. The cost of loving. If something were to happen to him, she would not survive it. "We aren't compatible."
Mary huffed. Emily shook her head. "I don't understand. You both seemed so happy."
"For now. But what about the next time rebels decide to kidnap him? Or worse?" Sophie's voice cracked. "These last few days were a wake up call for me. I'm not cut out to be a military girlfriend, sending the man I love off for months at a time. I was better off with one-night stands."
Emily's elbows landed on the table. "You can't mean that?"
"Why not?" Sophie tamped down the steam building at the base of her neck. "Do you expect me to spend my days wondering if he'll call and my nights alone in our bed? I'd rather be alone than live in constant fear that something might happen to him."
"It doesn't work that way." Finn placed a hand on Emily's shoulder. "Your world will only get smaller and smaller. That type of thinking is like a disease, and it spreads and infects into other areas of your life. Will you cut Emily out of your life to protect yourself from the heartache of maybe losing her?" Finn picked up the toddler in Emily's lap and brushed a hand over her fine hair. "Will you deny yourself the joy of being Lucy's aunt because she might fall and scuff her knee when she's three? Or break an arm playing ice hockey?"
Sophie's fingers itched to hold the infant that in only a few short weeks had taken over a part of her heart.
Emily took Lucy's tiny foot in her hand. "Don't even think that."
"That's the point." Finn kissed the top of his daughter's head. "I thought that and every other horrible nightmare my mind could conceive. I was terrified of not being able to protect Lucy from the world. Like I couldn't my parents. I'd lie awake at night and think if only I hadn't asked my parents for skates for my birthday, they wouldn't have been on the road, there would have been no accident. They never would have died."
Mary circled her hand on her swollen belly. "I felt the same about my mother and spent my life avoiding the one thing in this world that makes me the happiest. I regret the years I wasted denying my love for Simon." Her gaze flew to Finn. "The hurt I caused him."
"Don't you see Sophie?" Emily leaned in. "A life lived in fear is a life half lived. What happened to Thomas was a terrible, unfortunate accident. But it was an accident. No one's fault. You can't protect yourself from the world."
The back of Sophie's throat ached. Her friends didn't understand.
Emily shifted closer to Sophie. "If Thomas were here today, would he want you to cut yourself off from the world? From love? From life?"
Tears burned at the back of Sophie's eyes. "I can't lose him."
"I won't lie to you and say you won't." Emily stroked Sophie's arm. "But what about the years or lifetime of happiness you could have with Max? Is that not worth the risk? Is loving him and being loved by Max reason enough to take a chance? Is Max not worthy of receiving love? Your love?"
Sophie pushed past the lump in her throat. "He's worth the world. He deserves better than me."
"Maybe he does. But he wants you." Finn sank into the seat beside her. "He loves you."
Sophie shook her head. "Not anymore. I broke his heart. Max must hate me."
Mary rolled her eyes and pointed over Sophie's shoulder. "He sure doesn't look like he hates you."
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Hey DL here. I know, this was a short chapter. But the full chapter wasn't quite ready and I wanted to get something out for you to read. Give you some hope.
