Two Tribes

57: Fading Light

Najah sat alone in her room. The silence enveloped her like a heavy fog, suffocating her every breath.

She stared into space; completely lost in a sea of thoughts and emotions. Jameel had changed towards her. It now seemed as if his whole life revolved around Afrah and their child. The arrival of their newborn had brought a joy that seemed to consume him entirely. She couldn't help but feel like a forgotten shadow, fading away in the background of their lives. Jameel barely even had time for her anymore. His conversations with her were always curt and void of emotions.

Although Najah understood him, she yearned for his attention and affection. She missed the times when they used to sit together and talk about themselves. She missed how he used to confide in her.

The nights were the hardest for Najah. As she lay beside Jameel, their bodies separated by an invisible wall, she could feel the weight of her loneliness pressing down upon her. She longed for his touch, his warmth, and his love, but it seemed as though he had forgotten how to reach out to her.

When he professed his love for her, Najah thought she had finally gotten him. She thought all of her worries had come to an end, but it seemed she still had challenges to face. She began to doubt Jameel's love for her. Had he said it to her due to pressure? All she wanted from him was for him to notice the efforts she put in to look beautiful for him.

Earlier, she had gone to the saloon to make her hair, she had henna drawn on her hands and legs, and she applied makeup Just for Jameel. Unfortunately for her, he did not even spare her a second glance. His attention seemed to be only for Afrah and his newborn.

In the quiet moments, when the house was still and the world seemed to hold its breath, Najah would retreat to her own thoughts. She would sit in the solitude of her thoughts, tracing the lines of her own insecurities. She questioned her worth, wondering if she was simply a shadow in her husband's life, forever destined to be overshadowed by his love for Afrah. He may love her like he claimed but for a fact, she knew she could never take Afrah's place in his heart. it wasn't even her aim to. just like Afrah, she also wanted to create a secure place in his heart for herself. Afrah's worth was much more than hers in Jameel's life, it was pretty glaring.

Najah's sadness was not born out of jealousy or resentment, but rather out of a deep desire to be seen and loved for who she was. She longed for her husband to recognize the depth of her devotion, to understand the sacrifices she had made to be a part of his life. How hard she had been hiding the pain of losing her unborn kids behind a smile, simply because she wanted peace to reign in the house.

Najah had tried severally to mask her longing with busy distractions, but her heart remained heavy. She wanted to be a part of Fawaaz's life as well, but the fear of Afrah was keeping her away. Because she did not want to be disrespected by Afrah or talked down on, she decided to be in her own lane but as days passed, she felt her decision was making it look like she was jealous.

Her hunch was proven right when Jameel spoke to her about it.

"I have noticed you don't carry Fawaaz...why is that?"

Najah couldn't believe her ears. Jameel had practically been ignoring her all week, and the first thing he decided to ask her immediately after he walked into her room was that?

"How was work?" Najah asked, ignoring his question.

"I took a week off today."

Najah swallowed a ball of nerves in her throat. Gone were the days when Jameel would eagerly seek her opinion and value her input. But now that an impenetrable wall had been built between them, Najah could only get to know his plans after execution. The disconnect was loud. "Oh."