To His Future Lover (Haciendero #5)

PROLOGUE

PROLOGUE

Crimson Aurelle Aguirre-Ponce's

"Happy anniversary, Makoy."

I whispered against his ear for the last time as the clock stroke at midnight welcoming a new beginning. Hinalikan ko siya ng bahagya sa pisngi at hinaplos ang kanyang mukha.

Bumangon ako mula sa pagkakahiga ng kama ng walang ingay. My husband was sleeping peacefully. Rightfully so, he made me feel special on our anniversary.

I didn't have enough time. Sooner or later, he would know I wasn't in bed with him. Ayoko namang magising siya.

And I wasn't going anywhere.

Binuhay ko ang lamp shade sa study table. Inilabas ko ang ballpen at makintab na papel na itinabi ko sa drawer. Ilang minuto akong tumitig sa papel, hindi ko alam kung paano ko sisimulan ang nais kong ipahiwatig.

My hand was a bit shaky as I started to write on the piece of scented and glittery paper.

Hindi ko alam kung paano sisimulan pero alam kong nalalapit na ang pagtatapos. I wanted to write a letter.

Chance Macario... is a magnificent man. I was lucky enough to have a chance with him.

Humagikhik ako sa pangalawang pangungusap. That was witty of me!

We met in our early stage of life. I met him during my first day of school at daycare, and we became bestfriends in an instant. We were inseperable. Kaklase ko siya buong elementarya bago sila umuwi ng probinsya. Imagine my pain at that time, I was sad... my support system was on the other side of the province. I always called him every night, connection wasn't lost. Muli kaming nagsama noong kolehiyo nang bumalik sila sa siyudad.

It felt like those years apart never happened. Bumalik kami sa dati na parang hindi naghiwalay ng mahabang panahon. I got my bestfriend back and we were inseperable again.

Ngumiti ako habang inaalala ko ang memorya naming dalawa. I remember how scared I was admitting my feelings for him, I fucked up everything. Pero sa hinaba - haba ng prusisyon, sa simbahan pa rin ang tuloy naming dalawa.

We got married. Everything was fine until...

Our love story was the most common... from bestfriends to lovers. Marami ring pagsubok ang pinagdaanan naming dalawa, iyong aminan pa lang ng feelings, napakahirap na. Our love was a test of our friendship. If it failed, I would be losing him forever... I didn't want that at first.

Sa pag-aalinlangan ko, muntik din siyang mawala sa akin ng tuluyan. But we found a way to each other back again.

Kapag para isa't isa... paglayuin man ng tadhana, mahahanap pa rin ang daan upang magtagpo sa gitna. Naks!

He loves to cuddle. He's not Olaf, but he loves warm hugs. He loves soft kisses. He loves his nephews and nieces. He loves the hacienda. He loves doing chores and doing things for his loved ones, his love language checks all the boxes.

Napangiti ako sa pagsusulat.

But he's a bit of a liar...madalas niyang kimkimin ang mga bagay - bagay lalo na kapag nasasaktan siya. He would appear strong though his system is crumbling and in pain.

I sighed.

He is Chance Macario... the love of my life.

He is Chance Macario... my bestfriend.

He is Chance Macario... the most caring and kind person and a great lover.

And... he would be a great lover to you, too.

Huminga ako nang malalim. I stopped for the mean time when I felt a sudden pain. Pumikit ako upang palipasin ang sakit. It wasn't just in certain parts of my body, I was feeling the pain everywhere.

A few minutes later, the pain subsided.

If you are reading this letter, I'm long gone.

Makoy is probably moved on and wants to start a new life with you. I'm happy for him and for you both.

I wasn't a threat. I was just part of his past. Sometimes, I would be brought back in conversations, I hope you don't mind. Dahil alam kong kapag nabasa mo 'to, sigurado na siya sa'yo.

My tears started falling. Pinahid ko naman iyon nang tumulo sa papel na pinagsulatan ko.

It was definitely the hardest goodbye...

I was never prepared to leave him, if I was given a chance I wouldn't. We just had a short time. It was so unfair...

Konting oras na lang ang mayroon ako, at kapag wala na ako, ayokong ipagkait kay Makoy ang kasiyahan. I want him to move on... I want him to find a new life purpose... I want him to find a new love.

All I want for him is to be happy.

Give him all the love and attention he deserves. Be with him when times are rough. Be someone he could lean on. Be patient when he's being stubborn. He will give you the love and beyond in return.

Madali siyang mahalin pero mahirap pakawalan. You already find a treasure for a lifetime when you're with Chance. 'Wag mo nang sayangin ang pagkakataong makapiling siya.

I hope you could let him visit my grave once in awhile. That's what I'm only asking.

But it's still up to you.

Ingatan mo ang kanyang puso. Don't break his heart like I did.

My tears were smudging the ink. I put down my pen and took another break. Sumulyap ako sa natutulog kong asawa, bahagya pa siyang humaharok. It put a smile on my face.

Life's so unfair to only have one chance with him... in another life, I want to find him again.

Madalas kong nahuhuli ang aking sariling nakatingin lang sa kanya. If I was given a lifetime, I wouldn't hesitate to stare at his handsome face all the time. Kaya lang konti na lang ang pagkakataon ko kaya dapat ko nang sulitin.

It made me wonder about the afterlife more often... do I even remember the ones I loved once I'm dead? Or they just fade in my consciousness? I don't know. Wala akong ideya. I would find out sooner.

Sana... sana hindi ko masubaybayan kapag tuluyan na siyang nagmahal muli.

Kinuha ko ang ballpen at tinapos ang sulat.

Love,

Crimson Aurelle Aguirre-Ponce

I signed it with my name.

Binasa ko naman iyon nang mahina. I was about to fold it and put it inside an envelope, I noticed there was no salutation. Wala ring address na nakapaloob sa aking sulat.

Well... I was writing the letter for future purposes.

Marahan kong kinagat ang aking labi at bahagyang nag-isip. Lumapat muli ang tinta sa papel.

To his future lover, I wrote as the salutation.

Tinitigan ko iyon nang matagal bago ko ipinasok sa sobre at sinelyuhan gamit ang aking laway. Sinulatan ko rin ang envelope nang kapareha ng salutation. Inilagay ko iyon sa sulok ng drawer.

Muli akong bumalik sa pagkahiga sa kama at malaya kong pinagmasdan ang aking asawa. I couldn't help but smile, my shaky fingers were tracing his facial features. Napakagwapo naman talaga ng...

... bestfriend ko na, asawa ko pa.

Oh, Makoy ko. Mahal na mahal kita.

I wish I wouldn't leave you sooner.

But my body's already giving up on me.