Chapter 4

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I hope everyone had a good Christmas, if you celebrate it! :3


"Goh!"

Ash's voice calling me in the hallway makes me pause, and when I turn he's jogging to catch up with me, holding something in his hand. All along the corridor, people stop to watch him, visibly confused that he's talking to me when he stops.

"Hey," I say nervously. I haven't spoken to him since our detention on Monday, and now it's Wednesday, and school just finished. "Did you want me to tutor you again tonight?"

"Oh, I mean, sure, but look." He holds out a piece of paper, which I realise is his history test. I take it, and see the red score scribbled across the top. 87/100. "That's the best score I've gotten. Thanks, Goh."

Surprisingly, my heart lifts up a little for him. He seems so genuinely pleased. In all honesty, I didn't expect much from tutoring someone, but maybe it is doing some good after all. "Don't thank me. This was all you." I hand the paper back to him.

"And you," he argues, smiling. "But we do have that English assignment due on Friday, and..." he trails off, rubbing the back of his head. It's kind of charming to watch him acting nervous despite who he is.

"See you at six again?" I ask.

"Yeah," he says, nodding, and starts to shove the history paper in his bag. "Yours or mine?"

The casualness of the question makes me blush a little. "Mine?"

"Alright. See you then." He starts off down the corridor again, back towards where Gary and Serena are waiting for him. Distracted, it takes me a moment to remember I'm standing in the middle of the corridor like an idiot.

I meet Chloe at the foot of the steps outside. She's so distracted by something on her phone that she doesn't notice me approaching until I tap her on the shoulder and she jumps out of her skin. "Jeez, you scared me."

She was texting someone, I realise. As we fall into step alongside one another, I take a deep breath. "Can we talk, Chlo?"

She shoves her phone in her pocket and shoots me a concerned look. "Is everything okay?"

No. "I wanted to say sorry. I've been a bit of a bitch recently," I admit. Nobody likes admitting when they're wrong, but nothing is worth losing Chloe over. "It's not an excuse, but I haven't been sleeping, and with the breakup..." My throat closes up.

"I can tell you haven't been sleeping," she says, placing her hand on my arm. "You look so drained. Maybe you should speak to the school nurse?"

I shake my head. "I'll be fine. All of this will pass." I hope. "It's just..."

"You still love him," she guesses. I don't really need to reply- the grim look on my face will give her all the answers she needs.

"Yes, but I've also realised it's possible to be in love with someone and not want to be with them at the same time." I'd never take Tokio back now, even if he wanted me. He's hurt me too much, to the point where we would be strangers again. That doesn't make things any easier though.

"It's okay, Goh. I haven't been very open with you either, and at the worst time too. I should've known you needed me." She squeezes my arm gently. "I'm sorry too."

If I can admit to something, maybe she can too? "It's alright. I guess I just didn't understand where your crush on Ash came from so suddenly."

She pauses on the street, blinking blankly at me, until I come to a stop a few paces away from her, confused. Did I say something wrong? She opens and closes her mouth a few times, then clamps it shut, glancing around her like she's afraid of someone listening in. Then, she catches up to me, pulling a face I don't understand. "You're an idiot, Goh."

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