no i didnt get to submit this
"Time to get up!" She shouts at me. Just like every other day.
"Ok" I responded. I'm a bit annoyed at this rate, I would like a minute to wake up before I get told what to do. I'm half dressed as I grab my bag and finish putting on my shirt.
"Don't forget to do the dishes" I know you remind me every goddamn minute. I'll get to them when I have time.
"I know." I know what I have to do, the second you tell me what to do I don't want to do it.
"When you get home you have to do piano as well" Just shut up! Please for the love of god! I'm trying to get my shit together so I can get ready for school. I can't exactly do that with you telling me what to do constantly. I'm busy.
I run to the bathroom to get some kind of break from the constant annoyance. I'm not trying to be annoyed with her. It's not my fault that I want to do things on my own schedule.
I brush my teeth and straighten my hair. I look decent I guess. I wish I could have been born a guy. I don't feel like myself. I hate it. I just want to feel normal for once.
I start scratching at my skin, parts of it beginning to bleed. I look at my hands and legs now covered in broken flesh and blood. I wipe myself off not feeling the pain.
I can't feel it anymore, I know it hurts me but as they say "pain in the body quiets the pain in the mind". I don't even know who said that and I don't care if it's true. It works for me and that's all I care about.
I see the marks that it's left on my legs. I don't care. I deserve it honestly. I'll just wear pants today.
I come out of the bathroom returning to my backpack trying to sort through everything before I have to leave. I put in my lunch and double check I have my calculator before putting my shoes on and get out the door.
One car ride later with some awful conversation of her repeating herself until I responded. She should learn that I just want her to fuck off and let me enjoy my morning.
We pulled up to the office doors, I grabbed my back and got out. "Have a good day" She smiles at me. You were yelling at me not even two minutes ago. Don't even try to be nice now.
"You too" I say, I don't look at her as I close the car door and walk into the school.
I wish I could just stay at home and learn subjects I actually want or talk to my friends. I'd rather be happy and go get a job than go here every day.
I'd rather work 40 hours a week on minimum wage than be here. At Least I'd be making money while I suffer.
Some kid shoves me into a locker breaking my train of thought. Stupid asshole. Why can't kids here just mind their own business and leave me alone. The kid walks away laughing with his friends as some look back at me and start laughing harder.
The bell rings as I reach my first class. I'm exhausted from this morning and would rather not deal with anyone in my class. I sit down, turn up my music and sleep through the entire block.
The bell wakes me up, I see kids cleaning up projects and putting away textbooks. I don't care what I missed, I'll do it as homework at some point. All my grades are above 80% why would I give a shit?
