Jenlisa one shots (mostly jentop)

Only you

Jennie pov

I sat silent watching the raindrops hit the window the silence was heavy. I loathed this it made me want to gasp for air begging for relief but relief only came to those deserving , I knew I didn't deserve an ounce of it.

So I stayed silent watching the two doctors discussing between themselves. I felt sick deep down I wanted to turn my body inside out hoping someone would listen.

I was empty and seeking fulfilment in the form of these meetings just so I could hear she was okay. I would never forgive them though I only saw them so I could know how she was doing.

"Jen earth to Jennie?" Jisoo spoke softly waving her hand in my face it made me feel worse jisoo unnie never normally spoke softly to me whenever I wasn't paying attention but since that day months ago she has.

I meet Rosie's and Jisoo's worried gaze trying to ease them hoping they'd just believe I was okay and what I wanted to do was a good idea the truth being exposed by someone else would kill Lisa she had been through enough.

I took a deep breath "I know you don't agree with this I'm not asking you to just understand I have to protect her"

They both stared at me for what felt like hours before Jisoo stood up angrily "you can't keep saving her Jennie she took everything from you!" She yelled exasperatedly

I nodded "I also took everything from her chu I can't just let the world take this out on her I will do everything in my power and if you try to stop me I swear to god I will never speak to either of you again" I couldn't forget the hand they played in what happened.

Jisoo stared at me wide eyed shocked "To hell with everything else then huh? Our careers?
our family? You know the people who stood by your side throughout everything"

I smiled sadly "you haven't got a clue about the pain that I was caused by them it's not easy to forgive" I mumbled all those feelings I'd buried deep within threatening to escape from me.

Jisoo scoffed "god Jennie you're crazy you have to get over her! She broke you!"

I clenched my eyes closed hearing her harsh words I couldn't and wouldn't ever get over Lisa no matter how hard I tried "don't you dare Jisoo! You have no fucking idea how much she saved me from myself and everyone else!" I yelled back at her tears flowing freely.

I wanted to scream and smash everything in sight "I love her" I sniffed gripping the white cushion everything in this stupid room was white.

Ironically my knuckles started turning white as I held back the urge to start uncontrollably sobbing "and I always will only after I do this I will be at peace"

I looked down not wanting to meet their disappointed faces "she should do it" I heard rosé say almost as if it was an insult to think I shouldn't.

Jisoo's eyes grew wide "What! Have you forgotten about the consequences"

I watched intently waiting for a response to Jisoo

"Any consequence will be welcomed compared to this look at her Jisoo she's a shell of a person she's a living corpse and so is Lisa. If this helps them both in anyway we would be the worst people in the world. We can't get in the way of love" by now she had a lone tear rolling down her cheeks

Jisoo breathed out I knew this meant her heart was breaking in pieces for me.

I had learned early on she breathed out when something really hurt she'd told me about it

how she'd remind herself if she breathed it'd be over quicker whenever we both got in trouble at school and our parents were unhappy with us.

How she often found herself wondering if she breathed out enough she'd expel the hurt from her heart.